Funny Trump Suddenly Expresses Deep Concern About Conditions in Nation’s Prisons

Discussion in 'Blazers OT Forum' started by SlyPokerDog, Dec 13, 2018.

  1. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a sudden departure from his previous views on incarceration, Donald J. Trump said on Monday that he was “very, very concerned” about conditions in the nation’s prisons.

    “These are very, very bad places,” Trump told reporters. “These are not places you would want to be.”

    Trump criticized the “total lack of amenities” in the country’s federal penitentiaries, calling those prisons “a disgrace.”

    “If you are locked up in one of those places, there is no TV in your cell,” he said. “And good luck getting a Diet Coke. You can yell and yell and no one will go get you one. It’s a very sad, very sick situation.”

    In addition to blasting the conditions inside the nation’s prisons, Trump also questioned whether “putting someone in jail for one or two felonies serves any purpose.”

    “I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately,” he said. “Prison solves nothing.”

    https://www.newyorker.com/humor/bor...p-concern-about-conditions-in-nations-prisons
     
  2. Strenuus

    Strenuus Global Moderator Staff Member Global Moderator

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    Two things:

    He's gonna miss his Fox news and Coke when he gets in there.

    And

    He's a moron. You're in prison. Not a hotel
     
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  3. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    I can can yell for a diet coke from home and nobody gets me one....not that I'd drink that shit but Don's having prison fantasies...he must have been thinking...what would I miss the most if I'm Cohen's roommate?
     
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  4. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    This was satire. Not a real article.
     
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  5. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    of course we all know prisons should be just like Trump tower with cable tv and room service...hopefully a putting green
     
  6. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    [​IMG]
     
  7. PtldPlatypus

    PtldPlatypus Let's go Baby Blazers! Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    Why ruin the fun of watching people respond to it as though it were a legit quote?
     
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  8. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    You're right, my bad.
     
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  9. CupWizier

    CupWizier Well-Known Member

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    Sad part is, it's not far off from reality.
     
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  10. Strenuus

    Strenuus Global Moderator Staff Member Global Moderator

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    DAMNIT, I just saw the "humor" line in the URL.

    Thats the sad part, he'd say something like this.
     
  11. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    Like his presidency
     
  12. MARIS61

    MARIS61 Real American

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    In the Fake News Media, everything is satire whether intended or not.

    Real articles no longer exist, and our public schools stopped teaching the meaning of satire decades ago, which is why half the posters here think this is real, even after you explained it.
     
  13. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    Maybe you should learn what irony is before you criticize others for not knowing what satire is.

    Because you saying real articles no longer exist with the stuff you post is.... ironic.
     
  14. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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  15. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    See Maris...you can shut out all media, really just shut it off and only read the words of Trump ...then see how it stacks up...see the satire..see the falsehoods...the promises...the walk backs...the lies..the cover ups....as I said...only the Trump quotes...tell me you end up inspired and filled with truth and pride then...if you do..oh well..there's a real lesson in fake speechifying to be found in Trump's narrative..for someone who wanted to drain a swamp, there's really never been a more partisan and politically slanted President without a grip on real facts in American history
     
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  16. MarAzul

    MarAzul LongShip

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    Wow!
     
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  17. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    No worries, I'm sure you can mail Trump diet coke.
     
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  18. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    LOL
     
  19. stampedehero

    stampedehero Make Your Day, a Doobies Day Staff Member Moderator

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    He could direct architects to revise the wall blue prints to install a sally port to send our criminals to Mexico. thJQDFITYE.jpg
     
  20. stampedehero

    stampedehero Make Your Day, a Doobies Day Staff Member Moderator

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    He may be expecting future moving plans.
     
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