Funny Chuck Norris Jokes

Discussion in 'Blazers OT Forum' started by ABM, Jul 13, 2019.

  1. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    As a birthday gift from our brother-in-law, my wife received one of those little Chuck Norris daily-peel-off calendars.

    She's always had a little girl crush on the dude, and pretty much infatuated with anything CN-related. Anyway, she reads these little isms to me whenever I'm around for the daily peel-off event. Lucky me. Although, some of them are actually pretty funny.

    I decided to do a little search for CN jokes and found this so-called Internet Chcuk Norris Database. Go figure.

    http://www.icndb.com/the-jokes-2/

    I suppose many of you know a CN joke or meme. If so, feel free to post here. My wife will love you for it. Heh.
     
  2. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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  3. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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  4. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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  5. julius

    julius Global Moderator Staff Member Global Moderator

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    Just out of curiosity....would "our" brother in law be your wives sisters husband, or your sisters husband?
     
  6. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    Leave it to you to ask that question. :)

    My wife's sister's husband.
     
  7. julius

    julius Global Moderator Staff Member Global Moderator

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    was more confused than anything.
     
  8. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    No worries. My wife's sister is 2 years older than her and has been whipping her Chuck Norris crap their entire adult lives.

    As an aside, my wife asked me just this morning if we could get a Total Gym. I just gave her a blank stare.
     
  9. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    And then said yes...
     
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  10. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    Nope, and then said yes dear.
     
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  11. Mediocre Man

    Mediocre Man Mr. SportsTwo

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    Chuck Norris won Anerican Idol using sign language
     
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  12. barfo

    barfo triggered obsessive commie pinko Staff Member Global Moderator

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    He's from the south. Those are the same.

    barfo
     
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  13. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    :laugh:

    Minor correction, though. Not "from" the South.
     
  14. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    Papa Nurk > Chuck Norris.

    [​IMG]
     
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  15. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    I would tell a Chuck Norris joke but Bruce Lee used them all up already!
     
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  16. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    I once tried to use Chuck Norris as my password. The site said password too strong!
     
  17. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    The one trick Chuck never mastered was unscrewing a lightbulb with his roundhouse kick. Truckloads of broken glass trying though!
     
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2019
  18. MarAzul

    MarAzul LongShip

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    :wink:
     
  19. Mediocre Man

    Mediocre Man Mr. SportsTwo

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    God said "let there be light"

    Chuck Norris said "say please"
     
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  20. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    Chuck Norris doesn't wear condoms because there's no protection from Chuck Norris
     

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