The dirt they could/would find on me would be appalling. I think of myself as a pretty decent guy, but I ain't no saint, that's for sure...
The only reason I would run for public office is so I get to do the fucked up things that these people do. Which is why I wouldn't. Because I have a conscious.
That's nothing, I'm wearing a heart monitor and they told me to keep it dry. This is now my 12th day. The dirt on me would raise a lot of eyebrows. Okay, I cheated and have taken three showers but still ...
By the way, I use to subscribe to Playboy, Oui and Hustler. I also use to look at pornography on the internet. And I've been in many topless bars. However, since I married my wife that and most of my foul language is gone. I also now attend church on Sundays as often as my health permits which is most of the time but not all the time. Good grief, I don't even ogle at other girls anymore, even that desire is gone. Almost forgot, my drinking has dropped way way way off until now I have drink once a week or sometimes once a month. I do take a tiny sip of wine during communion. My God, I'm turning into my priest.
I use to play poker while drinking whiskey and smoking cigars also. We would tell dirty jokes and guys would take time-outs to watch porno. I used to wear outlandish hippie clothes and had long hair and a beard. My wife had me quit everything. However, she tells me that I'm much happier now. I have to believe her, she's the boss.
Who do you think I was playing poker with, watching porno with, exchanging dirty jokes with, watching topless dancers with? Wife's calling me, got to go, she's the boss.
Man, I wish the engineers I knew were like you and liked to have fun. Most I knew in the midwest would rather stay in their cubicles and never wanted to go have fun. Yeah, in the mid west many smoked and drank beer, but to get them to go to ball game and tail gate or hit a few bars was tough to do.