Ok, I checked the posts, and I didn't see anything on this subject in the recent past. Pretty simple- What is the funniest thing that you have seen done/said by an active Blazer teammate, either on the court, or off? My number one event involved Robert Pack. Undrafted, yet signed by the Blazers, he is one of my all time favorite "bench warmers" for the team. It was a sad day when he went away..... Anyways, it was garbage time at the end of a game in the early 90's. Pack gets a breakaway and has a clear path to the hoop. (A few years later, even though he was only 6'1", he places second to Isaha Rider in the slam dunk contest.) Not so much this time..... Uncontested, he SOARS through the air, and goes for one of the most powerful dunks I had ever seen. Umm, well, he kinda mistimed it though. The camera work throughout this was phenomanal!!! The launch of the ball off the back of the rim could only have been rivaled by the space shuttle. As it bounces, and heads to land somewhere near midcourt, they cut away and show Clyde. Modest, mild mannered Mr. Drexler, is sitting on the bench LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF. My thought at the time was; "Pack was trying SO HARD to impress Clyde". Epic failure.... I would love it if one of you guys/gals happen to stumble across footage for that game. Don't bother flaming me if my facts aren't 100% accurate. My brain is getting worn, ya know. Honestly, the ball could have headed for the 300 level, and not midcourt....
I was fucking wasted in Vegas at 1am and Lillard and Vanterpool were randomly walking by me right by the Fashion show mall bridge to Wynn and I just yelled "DAME!!!! RIP CITAAAAAAAYYYYYYY". They just kind of were like wtf. It was the summer after he hit "The Shot"
One time I was walking around the strip with my friend late at night and some weirdo thought one of us was Dame. He yelled something at us. I don't remember what he looked like but his smell will live with me for the rest of my life.
I caddied at the NBA Players golf tournament when it was held in Portland when I was a kid. Ended up caddying first for Dennis Johnson and when he was done I got to caddying for Johnnie Moore. Last day of the tourney I bring a basketball to get autographs, I got Dr J's, Westphal, Walter Davis, tons of players, anyway I see Billy Ray Bates and run up to him. Ask him for his autograph and hand him the ball. He starts to slowly print his name in these large block letters. BILLY RAY "DUNK" BATES #12 Each line was on one panel of the ball, 1/4 of the ball now had his child like printing on it. I looked at him stunned. I almost wanted to cry, Billy Ray Bates ruined my autograph ball. Then when I went to get other player's autographs they would look at Billy Ray's autograph and they would start laughing and commenting, none of them had ever seen an autograph like that.
My dentist used to be the Blazer dentist (till Moda showed up). Every time I had some work done he would always call in the evening to see how I was feeling, even when he was at the Blazer game. One night after some especially painful work he called from the game to see how I was doing. Sabonis happened to be on the injury list and was sitting next to the doc. My doc handed the phone to Sabonis without telling me who it was. Suddenly I heard this deep voice with a foreign accent asking me if "Toot hurt?" and telling me to "feel many better". I sure thought it was funny and it certainly made me smile through the pain..... My other favorite story was that back in the day I coached Steve Johnson's son on my older son's basketball team. Steve wanted his son to be more aggressive on the boards and offered to pay the kid a dollar for every rebound he snagged. Marcus really got into that and the team parents kept a running tally during the game, cheering loudly for each one. One game we were in a dogfight and I was really into it (to say I could be intense is a massive understatement). Marcus grabbed a rebound and through the the noise and the excitement I heard Steve holler, 'Nother buck!!!" In my wound up state I heard it as something entirely different. It was like time stood still. I turned around horrified and stared open mouthed at Steve and the father sitting next to him. They looked at me like, "Wha....??" When I told them to be more careful with their language they were mortified. When we sorted it out, I was the mortified one and we had a huge laugh over it. One of those "you had to have been there" moments I guess.......
Schuler falling on his ass at the presser Rice getting ejected Any Waltonism. He was a Blazer, so I'm counting it Brad Nessler: And Sumaki Walker checks into the game. Walton: So THIS is what it's come to? Can't remember laughing harder
I used to rent an apartment on SE Hawthorne, it was in this old 2 story building directly across the street from the Space Room. Next door to the apartment was Black's Dry Cleaners. I had a large window that looked out on their roof so naturally I claimed their roof as mine and set up a patio on it. Lights, chairs, a table. The roof had one of those large walls/fronts on the street side so you couldn't see from the street that I had turned their roof into a party pad. Had many a party up there especially after the bars closed. Further down Hawthorne was the youth hostel, friends and I used to go there to pick up chicks. Very easy place to meet women. They were up for adventure and to get to know the city. Meet some girls, take them around the neighborhood, have some drinks, bring them back to the party roof.... Good times. One time some friends and I are at the hostel and Drazen Petrovic shows up. He too knows the power of the Youth hostel. My friends and I ended up partying with Drazen and 5 women. Really good time. Drinks, bar hopping. We all end up at my apartment and the roof next door, partying late into the night. ... Not even a month goes by and some friends and I are playing poker at my place. Cigars, booze, typical guy poker night when my door bell rings, I open the door and there is Drazen with a very cute and really drunk German girl. "Drazen!" They come in and we're talking, we give him a drink, we give her a drink, he pulls me aside and asks if he can take her on the roof next door. I said sure and open the window and they are out on the roof. We go back to playing poker while Drazen and the girl get busy on the roof. Couldn't see them but it was pretty easy to figure out what was going on. Half hour later they come back in, talk a little more and take off.
How about at the blazers lottery party downtown, we were supposed to get the #1 pick and got what, the 4th? This was the year we ended up getting LA and BRoy...... As soon as they announced that we slipped to 4th, I swear to you the RISE WITH US sign above Wheels and the Mikes on the fell off the wall onto their heads!
In general I haven't found youth to be particularly hostile.....and those girls certainly didn't sound like it. Just sayin'.....
I remember when Qyntel Woods botched a wide open fast break attempt. He tried to jump from the FT line and came up about 5 feet short.
My buddy was working at Suncoast at Lloyd Center back in the late 90's and early 2000's... Sheed and Bonzi Wells were regulars. I was hanging out, visiting my friend when Sheed and Bonzi walked in. We watched them scour the store, grabbing DVD after DVD. They came up to the counter with two HUGE piles. Sheed pays for his, and Bonzi says "He's got mine too." Sheed looks at him, then looks at his pile and yells, "Fuck n***a, I'm not buy you no movies till you get better taste!" Everyone in the Suncoast broke out laughing. Bonzi had to buy his own movies.
Nope, we had the 4th pick, Charlotte had the 3rd pick. They used it on Adam Morrison. We started with the 4th pick and ended up turning it, Telfair and Khryapa, into the two best players in the draft. BNM
Back in Nov 2003 not long before we traded Bonzi Wells, and a month after Woods was pulled over by police, giving his players card as ID...I was walking around the Moda center before a game and Wells and Randolph were standing in the concourse greeting fans. I walked up and they both looked down at me...I'm only 5'4...and Zach said, "What's up little man." And I pulled out a Qyntel Woods playing card, and asked them to give it to him, you know just in case the cops confiscated the other one. They started laughing so hard, and took it, promised to give it to him...high fived me.
MMM, nothing really noteworthy. MY favorite memories are still of going to games back in the Clyde era. I remember getting a Kiki face mask and having him sign it, but then destroyed it wearing it, instead of keeping it for memory sake.
Might've told this one before. When I was 9 or so I was in a line of a bunch of kids that gave the players hi-fives when they ran out. While walking back through the tunnel afterwards, Zach Randolph was slowly strollin along. My mom asks him if he'll take a picture with me and says it'll only take 5 seconds and he says "Nah, I gotta get out there." Understandable, until he proceeds to walk up to the concession stand and ask for two hotdogs...
