Religion Story of Jesus Christ was 'fabricated to pacify the poor', claims controversial Biblical scholar

Discussion in 'Blazers OT Forum' started by SlyPokerDog, Oct 4, 2017.

  1. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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  2. BrianFromWA

    BrianFromWA Editor in Chief Staff Member Editor in Chief

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    well, poop. Now what am I to do?
    #crushed
     
  3. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    Duh! Start your own religion.

    BrianFromHeaven
     
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  4. BrianFromWA

    BrianFromWA Editor in Chief Staff Member Editor in Chief

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    I can't get people to come to my birthday party. How will I get a religion, unless founded upon hookers and blo---

    brb
     
  5. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    You didn't invite me to your dad's birthday party the last time you were in town.
     
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  6. BrianFromWA

    BrianFromWA Editor in Chief Staff Member Editor in Chief

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    Actually, I did, and you had some bullshit excuse about a restraining order within 10 blocks of Mall 205...
     
  7. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    Hey, you promised not to say anything about that.
     
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  8. theprunetang

    theprunetang Shaedon "Deadly Nightshade" Sharpe is HIM

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    It wouldn't surprise me.
     
  9. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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  10. noknobs

    noknobs Well-Known Member

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    When we consider what Santa Claus does every year: Traveling 122 million miles in one night at roughly 1,500 miles per second. He does this on a magical flying sleight that carries well over 200 million presents and weights approximately 1,232,300 metric tones and which is pulled by only 8 reindeer, to which he's given the power of flight at 320 times the speed of sound. Under highly stressful conditions he has to map out the quickest route between 75 million homes while knowing which kids are naughty and nice within each house. To further complicate things, thousands of kids move from the nice list to the naught list, and vice versa, every hour. A single mistake could cause childhood trauma. And that doesn't factor in having cookies and milk millions of times that night, kissing approximately 300,000 moms under the mistletoe and climbing in and out of millions of chimneys, many of which have chimney caps. And he does all this while being a fat ass.

    When we measure that up against Jesus, who's big accomplishment is being resurrected (only once I might add), I give the nod to Santa 10 times out of 10. He's who we should really be worshipping.
     
  11. rasheedfan2005

    rasheedfan2005 Well-Known Member

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    I had the theory myself early in the faith. But there are verses that show there is a righteous anger and a time for rebelion as well. You should be humble, but not a pushover. Jesus allowed them to crucify him because it was a required ritual to cleanse sin. He fulfilled the levitical ritual laid out in the old testiment substituting himself for the unblemeshed lamb.

    It is important to remember jesus flipped the tables of the merchants in front of the temple.
     
  12. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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  13. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    Yeah... I told my son the truth...
     
  14. santeesioux

    santeesioux Just keep on scrolling by

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    That Santa is actually Odin?
     
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  15. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    Santa is Satan
     
  16. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    Haha!

    No, that there's no such thing as a creepy old man sneaking into people's houses, eating their food, bringing "presents".

    MF, I'm Santa.
     
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  17. PtldPlatypus

    PtldPlatypus Let's go Baby Blazers! Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    If Santa was black...

    ...so many ways to finish that sentence...
     
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  18. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    Supposed to really look like this:

    [​IMG]
     
  19. Natebishop3

    Natebishop3 Don't tread on me!

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    The thing about religion is that if you go back and look at how religion was used to control the populace for thousands of years, it makes you wonder why this particular religion is supposed to be the real one and not just another example of corrupt men preying on the poor and the weak.

    The Greeks...

    The Romans...

    The Egyptians...

    The Aztecs...

    Some pretty major civilizations had their own religions that were used to pacify and control the people, and if you look at how Christianity was used by the Catholics, with the Crusades and the Spanish Inquisition, and then the Church of England.... plenty of examples to demonstrate how this religion was used in the same way.
     
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  20. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    Maannnn.... We ain't comin' down NOBODY'S chimney... Jussayin. :P
     

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