File Under: Most Ludicrous Idea Of The Year

Discussion in 'Portland Trail Blazers' started by ABM, Sep 27, 2019.

  1. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    https://ripcityproject.com/2019/09/25/kobe-considered-candidate-buy-portland-trail-blazers/

    Should Kobe be considered a candidate to buy the Portland Trail Blazers?

    Join us for a trip down uncanny valley, where Kobe Bryant could realistically become the next owner of the Portland Trail Blazers.

    Alright, calm down. I know, accepting the reality where a long-time franchise rival and controversial figurehead Kobe Bryant could logically become the best choice to assume ownership of the Portland Trail Blazers is a tough pill to swallow. Even so, we’re here to shine a light on why that may not be such a bad thing after all.

    Since Microsoft co-founder and former Blazers’ owner Paul Allen passed in October of 2018, the Portland Trail Blazers have been suspended in a state of purgatory. While Paul’s sister Jody has done a commendable job thus far managing the situation and honoring her late brother’s legacy, this is not likely a venture we can expect her to want to be preoccupied with forever. (CONTINUED......)
     
  2. mook

    mook The 2018-19 season was the best I've seen

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    After I got done throwing up in my mouth, I was surprised how quickly I came around to the idea.
    • Kobe made a career out of manipulating the league to get things his way, from forcing a trade at draft to the Lakers, getting rid of Shaq, and all the way up to the year-long Retirement Masturbation Tour. Wouldn't you like him manipulating shit for us?
    • He really hasn't raped anybody in, like, a decade or so.
    • Modern players idolize him. He and Lillard would be an amazing tag team for recruiting free agents.
    • Tales of his work ethic are legend. I think he'd set a standard for effort that would trickle down throughout the organization.
    • There's no denying he's smart as fuck.
    In the end, I want the Blazers to win. Even if it means putting up with that mother fucker.
     
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  3. PtldPlatypus

    PtldPlatypus Let's go Baby Blazers! Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    He's already got his outfit for white-out nights.

    upload_2019-9-27_7-7-17.png
     
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  4. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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  5. tlongII

    tlongII Legendary Poster

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    I didn't read the article, but there's no way he's got the kind of money to be a majority owner. He's rich, but not MJ rich.
     
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  6. B-Roy

    B-Roy If it takes months

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    This is the only thing that interests me. But I don't think even Kobe could get free agents to consider Portland. Color me skeptical.
     
  7. crandc

    crandc Well-Known Member

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    No.
     
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  8. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    People say Kobe will bring in players...he can also chase them away...he chased Shaq away at the peak of their championship era...if he were smart he'd have played his whole career with Shaq
     
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  9. Binx

    Binx Well-Known Member

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    Uh, no. No way in hell.
     
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  10. CupWizier

    CupWizier Well-Known Member

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    lol. towards the end of his career he was having trouble attracting free agents to the lakers.
     
  11. BlazerWookee

    BlazerWookee UNTILT THE DAMN PINWHEEL!

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    Not no.

    Not Hell no.

    But Hell fucking no.
     
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  12. Jade Falcon

    Jade Falcon Just to piss you off.

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    [​IMG]

    X 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000
     
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  13. THE HCP

    THE HCP NorthEastPortland'sFinest

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    Hmmmmmm
     
  14. crandc

    crandc Well-Known Member

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    Speculation on top of speculation.

    So far as I know none of us has had private conversations with Jody, we don't know what her intentions are. And even if she's selling, would she sell Paul's beloved Blazers to Kobe Fucking Bryant? And does he have the money to buy this or any other team? No doubt a work ethic, but if he's still seen as a peer that's a weakness.

    Of all the things I lose sleep over, this is low on the list.
     
  15. kjironman1

    kjironman1 Well-Known Member

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    Well then okay! I draw the line at a decade though.
     
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  16. ABM

    ABM Happily Married In Music City, USA!

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    Is that your personal statutory of limitations?
     
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  17. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    I can see Kobe telling CJ....ISO ball man..forget those guys...you're the shooter! They need to pass to you!
     
  18. kjironman1

    kjironman1 Well-Known Member

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    “Demand the BALL!”
     
  19. PHXBlazer1

    PHXBlazer1 Well-Known Member

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    His venture capital firm manages over $2 billion in assets..if you watch his recent interview on CNBC (I think) he’s obviously business savvy. And no doubt has some good advisors working with him. I wouldn’t have a problem with this.
     
  20. Jade Falcon

    Jade Falcon Just to piss you off.

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    I do. The man would try and turn us into LA Lite. His only redeeming quality is that he likes and respects Dame.
     

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