<div class="quote_poster">MrJ Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Would you date a hot girl who was like 6'5"?</div> hell no.
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">Yeah, I know what you're saying, I dunno, its just kind of difficult, being in the situation we're in, for some reason. I'm just trying to tread very lightly with her, I dont want to ruin anything between us, wether thats as friends, or more. It's just strange because she'll come into work sometimes, like depressed and hardly says a word to me, then she'll come in at other times, and be like she was last night with me. I dont just want to assume anything either, for all I know she may just be "trying to have fun" with me, rather than give me signals as to anything more than that, and especially since we work together, it would become tough if things suddenly became awkward between us. But then, in saying that, what if she is trying to give me a sign/s, and I dont act on it? I'm just thinking / obsessing too much now. Next week, I'm just going to calm myself, and go into work, and just go for it. This woman stuff really does my head in, lol. As Damon Wayans said on My Wife & Kids once "Son, theres only one thing stopping me from going to play for the other team" </div> Just be straight up with her man and let her know how you're feeling. Don't hesitate if you really like her, because she might view you as passive or she might think that you don't like her like that.
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post">Would you date a hot girl who was like 6'5"? </div> Man a couple of weeks ago at a rockets viewing party there was this beauuuuuuuuuuuuuutiful girl, BUT she had to be at least 6'4....I just couldn't do it man, and this woman was gorgeous as hell......
<div class="quote_poster">THE DREAM Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Just be straight up with her man and let her know how you're feeling. Don't hesitate if you really like her, because she might view you as passive or she might think that you don't like her like that.</div> Yeah, I know I need to be, and I want to, It's just sort of like, work doesnt exactly feel like the best place to say these kind of things, you know what I'm saying? But I mean I never really see her outside of work, so I guess I'll have to do it there
<div class="quote_poster">NTC Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Yeah, I know I need to be, and I want to, It's just sort of like, work doesnt exactly feel like the best place to say these kind of things, you know what I'm saying? But I mean I never really see her outside of work, so I guess I'll have to do it there </div> Word. Just had something similar happen with this girl at my work. Yesterday was her last day so I finally got around to getting her number, never would have had contact with her outside of work if she wasn't leaving. Talked to her for a few hours last night and she wants to go "job searching" with me now because I'll probably leave soon too.
Ok, I'm going to explain my situation a bit more here, as I have some under lying issues which relates back to this type of thing. Back in 2001 was the last time I had a girlfriend, I was 14, and I had no problems, or concerns about anything, I was doing pretty good with the girls, I had alot of girl friends, and alot of girls that liked me, I was funny, out going etc. etc. bit of a clown I guess you could say, but they lapped it up. Puberty started kicking in, I started getting acne, I grew taller, was skinny and since I stopped wearing my retainer, my teeth started to move out again. In 2003 we moved to a new state, which I was 100% against, I hated it, once we got here I just made no effort, to meet people, or anything like that, I became really depressed, I hated the way I looked, I wasnt suicidal or anything like that, I just hated what I had become. I had no confidence in myself anymore, I became really shy, my social side was non existant, I had friends from school, but outside of school I never hung out with them, or spoke to them (except for a few occasions), and I had now become almost afraid to talk to girls on any level. In 2006, I decided I was moving back to my old state, where all my friends were, back to the days when I had no problems, where everything was fine and dandy. So I went back, I stayed with my friends family, I started getting better, I was happy to be back, I felt better about myself, I was out doing things again, socializing with people, meeting new people, but I still wasnt back to how I was when I was younger. After 4 months, my friends Mother sat me down and told me it was probally time for me to go back home, as I hadnt been able to find work, that night I broke down, cried, because I knew what was awaiting me back home (my old sheltered self). A few days had passed after this, I had calmed myself down, and I did alot of thinking, I was missing my parents a bit, so I was kind of keen to see them again, plus there were some other issues with my friends Mother that started driving me crazy, so I thought that maybe coming back wouldnt be so bad, I had no other choice but to go back anyway, so I did, I flew back a couple of days later. I got back, I saw my Dad at the Airport, and was really happy to see him, he even commented on how much I had changed, I wasnt hiding behind a baseball cap like I used to, I was just looking better. We got home, and my parents had told me about all the things that had changed, since I hadnt seen them in 4 months, it felt weird, like I was in an entire new place. The next day I came on MSN, and one of my old friends from up here sent me a message asking if I wanted to have a shoot around that day, so I agreed, went down, and met up with some of my other friends there too. I dunno what it was, but I just felt good to be back amongst them, I mean we were never really that close before I left, but now, I dunno, I just appreciated the fact they still wanted to be my friends. I guess it was then that I sort of grew out of hating myself, I started going out clubbing, socializing etc. with these friends I had left behind, and I guess the fact that it was that I was doing so with "new" people, that made me realize, that I can do it. I'm still a bit self conscious about myself (who isnt?), but I'm in a phase right now where I'm determined to make myself a better person, I've been going to the gym now for about 8 months (looking pretty ripped, hahaha), I've grown my hair, I got braces again to help straighten up my smile, and I'm just really looking forward to how I will feel once I get them off (as talking and smiling is one thing I hated doing with my teeth the way they were). I've started having a bit more success with women as of lately, but I'm still not 100% confident in myself, and all that time shunning myself away from people, I dont really know how to talk or relate to women that well. I know what I should be doing, its just tough trying to overcome my insecurities when it comes to women. So yeah, that was a long read I know, but as Run BJM this thread is quite therapeutic, and I thought I should explain my situation a bit better, as so you can understand, and help me over come my social insecurities when it comes to speaking to / trying to hook up with women Just for the record, I feel better about myself now, I'm happy with the way I look, who I am etc.
<div class="quote_poster">NTC Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Back in 2001 was the last time I had a girlfriend, I was 14, and I had no problems, or concerns about anything, I was doing pretty good with the girls, I had alot of girl friends, and alot of girls that liked me, I was funny, out going etc. etc. bit of a clown I guess you could say, but they lapped it up. Puberty started kicking in, I started getting acne, I grew taller, was skinny and since I stopped wearing my retainer, my teeth started to move out again. In 2003 we moved to a new state, which I was 100% against, I hated it, once we got here I just made no effort, to meet people, or anything like that, I became really depressed, I hated the way I looked, I wasnt suicidal or anything like that, I just hated what I had become. I had no confidence in myself anymore, I became really shy, my social side was non existant, I had friends from school, but outside of school I never hung out with them, or spoke to them (except for a few occasions), and I had now become almost afraid to talk to girls on any level.</div> I was in a fairly similar situation. After middle school I went to a different high school from all of my other close friends, inevitably me and all my friends who now went to a different high school grew apart. The first two years of high school I never hung out with any of my friends from school and was too far gone from my old friends to call them up and see what they're up to. I haven't had a girlfriend since freshman year of high school either (knew her from middle school of course) but I'm only a junior right now. I've always been shy around people I don't know, lately I've learned alcohol helps a lot with that though . I never hated myself or anything like that, just was caught in an awkward situation between two groups of friends, now I'm content with my friends from my current school though and still talk to my old friends when I see them around. Don't want to be too emo or anything but it sucked for a while there so you're not the only one to go through something like that. I've never been uncomfortable around women because I was raised by my mother with only my sister and half sister living with us off and on. I think my perspective of women is kind of hit and miss though, on some aspects I know how to deal with women better than my friends who weren't raised like I was (i.e. you'll never win an argument with a women, ever, never) but on others I have a ****** up idea of them which I think is true because its what I've experienced. The only problem I have is that it takes a while for me to open up to people, once I do I don't shut the hell up though. Thats where alcohol helps me in social situations, I know how to make women laugh but I'm too quiet and passive when I'm sober to say anything to them unless I know them well.
<div class="quote_poster">Run BJM Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">The only problem I have is that it takes a while for me to open up to people, once I do I don't shut the hell up though. Thats where alcohol helps me in social situations, I know how to make women laugh but I'm too quiet and passive when I'm sober to say anything to them unless I know them well.</div> Thats exactly the same as me, I've seen alot of people come and go in my life (moving around a fair bit), so thats what attributed to that. I just dont open up to people very easily, probally out of fear of growing attatched, then losing them, as I've become so accustomed to in my life. Although I've noticed myself starting to care less and less about this now.
NTC, always be happy who you are. That goes for anyone. We're all unique individuals, even those little suckers that get banned for spamming.
<div class="quote_poster">M Two One Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">NTC, always be happy who you are. That goes for anyone. We're all unique individuals, even those little suckers that get banned for spamming.</div> Oh I am now, I just went through a stage there where I didnt. I never really "hated" myself per say, should've worded it better, it was more, I didnt like the way I looked, I didnt like the way I was becoming. And that just really hurt my interaction 'skills' with women. I'm alot better when it comes to talking to them today, but I still need to learn to open up a bit more easily.
NTC, your story is kind of similar to mine on some levels. The only thing I'm still struggling with is being somewhat skinny; I'm assuming I'll gain weight once I get into University next year. How old are you now by the way?
<div class="quote_poster">Karma Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">NTC, your story is kind of similar to mine on some levels. The only thing I'm still struggling with is being somewhat skinny; I'm assuming I'll gain weight once I get into University next year. How old are you now by the way?</div> I just turned 20 in March
<div class="quote_poster">NTC Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Oh I am now, I just went through a stage there where I didnt. I never really "hated" myself per say, should've worded it better, it was more, I didnt like the way I looked, I didnt like the way I was becoming. And that just really hurt my interaction 'skills' with women. I'm alot better when it comes to talking to them today, but I still need to learn to open up a bit more easily.</div> I can relate to you, though I was confident around girls once I hit 16. What I mean though is that I didn't like the way I looked, but I think I had good reason. I was too overweight. What didn't you like about yourself?
<div class="quote_poster">M Two One Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">I can relate to you, though I was confident around girls once I hit 16. What I mean though is that I didn't like the way I looked, but I think I had good reason. I was too overweight. What didn't you like about yourself?</div> Well I started getting acne, I was pretty tall, skinny, pale, I just felt ugly, and it didnt help having people call me ugly too, wether jokingly or not. Sort of just killed my confidence within myself off. But like I said, I managed to get it back.
<div class="quote_poster">Quote:</div><div class="quote_post"> I just turned 20 in March </div> Sorry to veer the topic off on a personal topic, but did your metabolism naturally slow down or you just started eating much more and much healthier than before along with working out?
<div class="quote_poster">NTC Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Well I started getting acne, I was pretty tall, skinny, pale, I just felt ugly, and it didnt help having people call me ugly too, wether jokingly or not. Sort of just killed my confidence within myself off. But like I said, I managed to get it back.</div> I still have some acne, but not bad. Usually on the legs or arms a bit, but nothing major. My confidence started to falter when I was told that my arms were too skinny when I always felt I was rather strong there. Still bothers me, but I have high confidence these days since working out more often and especially now that I'm engaged. It is a cool feeling when someone asks me out on a date and then I get to say, "I'm sorry, but I'm engaged." Then they're all surprised because I'm only 23.
Give Oprah a call - The JBB Special. lol <div class="quote_poster">M Two One Wrote</div><div class="quote_post">Then they're all surprised because I'm only 23.</div> You're 23? I was imagining you to be like 30 or 40?
