Bill Simmons trolls Portland... again

Discussion in 'Portland Trail Blazers' started by santeesioux, Oct 23, 2009.

  1. Wheels

    Wheels Is That A Challenge?!?!1! Staff Member Global Moderator

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    Simmons also will be on the "I will ignore dipwits" near years resolution.
     
  2. STOMP

    STOMP mere fan

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    tha'd be the one

    dude is riffing... I don't find him particularly insightful or funny, but he gets more leeway with misrepresenting reality as he is clearly trying for jokes.

    STOMP
     
  3. oldmangrouch

    oldmangrouch persona non grata

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    The "Animal House" reference has me thinking. If we are going to repond, it might as well be an over-the-top nuclear response!

    Can anybody lay their hands on a crate of replica Len Bias jerseys?
     
  4. BrianFromWA

    BrianFromWA Editor in Chief Staff Member Editor in Chief

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    Wow. Just....wow.
     
  5. BoBoBREWSKI

    BoBoBREWSKI BURP!

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    Simmons wrote this crap to get this exact type of response.
     
  6. BenDavis503

    BenDavis503 Banned User BANNED

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    Actually, you are wrong again. It is crayon.
     
  7. oldmangrouch

    oldmangrouch persona non grata

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    I suppose the photo-shopped posters of his wife with Danny Ainge are in equally bad taste? :devilwink:
     
  8. BBert

    BBert Weasels Ripped My Flesh

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    The best response would be for him to be greeted with crickets at his book 'signing.'

    Literally, release a few dozen crickets into the book store.

    Just ignore the douche.
     
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2009
  9. Schilly

    Schilly Well-Known Member

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    I actually have similar concerns about the Nate aspect though.
     
  10. RoyIsClutch07

    RoyIsClutch07 Active Member

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    One thing I do agree with is this. Not all of it. I'm not ready to say he is a bad fit because I don't think he is...yet. But, how the two eventually came together in union. I do.

    21. Andre Miller
    We knew Miller was a bad fit when the Blazers signed him. It just didn’t feel right. He’s a moody loner; they had great chemistry last season. He needs the ball in his hands; so does Brandon Roy. He likes freelancing; Nate McMillan is hands on. But Portland felt obligated to spend its extra cap money, and nobody else was pursuing Miller, so what transpired was the equivalent of two single wedding guests going through the motions on the dance floor.

    I could use someone, and you could use someone. Unfortunately, I hate bald guys and I have a tiny butt; you’re bald and you love bubble butts. We have no spark and are destined to fail. But crap, there’s nobody better. Screw it, would you like to come back to my room?

    I get Portland’s thinking: It wanted to turn that cap space into an asset. And I get Miller’s thinking: He wanted to get paid and hoped things would work out. But now we’re here. Incredibly, Portland plans on bringing Miller off the bench. He’s already miserable. (And available, by the way. Make Kevin Pritchard an offer. Seriously, call him right now.) So what did we learn? Just because you have cap space doesn’t mean you HAVE to use it
     
  11. MIXUM

    MIXUM Suspended

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    what simmons did was play devils advocate to all the other guys on espn who picked us.

    he listed every concern we have but didnt give any positives.

    I mean if you asked a espn nba reporter to list the positives about the blazers... it would be easy. But if you asked why the blazers could fail... simmons nailed it and said what many on here are afraid of.

    Simmons just is predicting a season where we dont live up to the hype. in that prediction he says everything we have already during the pre season.

    1. Miller doesnt fit.

    2. Too much talent.

    3. Nate isn't the right coach

    4. West is much improved.

    5. LA might be over payed. Hes no banger and doesnt rebound all that well.


    Is Simmons lying or is he saying what you fear to be true as a blazer fan? Things that upset us cause reaction which he got easily. Think of it this way.... tons of hits just from blazer fans who he knows has a huge fan base. To ESPN... the hits on the site look great and he looks like a star. Its a win win either way. If he gets the prediction right... he was the only one who said we would suck therefore he knows his shit. If he gets it wrong... he still got tons of visitors and email about it. He cant lose on this one. Not to mention he's coming here for his book. How many other fan bases in the NBA would react to a column shitting on their team like blazer fans???? Have you noticed how many writers make little comments about blazer fans on message boards? Even Cowherd on radio mocked us the other day. We have that reputation and Simmons is using it to get hits. Guess what? It worked like a charm!
     
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2009
  12. santeesioux

    santeesioux Just keep on scrolling by

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    Mixum = Bill Simmons?
     
  13. RoyToy

    RoyToy Clown Town

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    Never cared what he had to say before so this doesn't bother me.
     
  14. STOMP

    STOMP mere fan

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    fixed it for you

    addressing Bill and your concerns...

    1. BS
    2. :biglaugh:
    3. whatever... 21, 32, 41, 54
    4. we'll see, I think it's slightly improved
    5. LA plays for the best rebounding team in the league and is a solid versatile defender. A good high post player isn't a "banger", they make jumpers.

    STOMP
     
  15. ehizzy3

    ehizzy3 RIP mgb

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    Fuck bill simmons lol
     
  16. illmatic99

    illmatic99 formerly yuyuza1

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    Bulletin board.

    I want the team to see this. HCP, hook it up.
     
  17. Boob-No-More

    Boob-No-More Why you no hire big man coach?

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    How about this one:

    Hire a couple dozen overweight house fraus to show up in spandex and leg warmers holding copies of this:

    [​IMG]

    Put it down on the table for Simmons to autograph, notice it's the wrong Simmons, grab their book and storm off saying:

    "I thought they said Richard Simmons was going to be here, not this loser that no one's ever heard of!"

    BNM
     
    Erroneous Subterfuge likes this.
  18. oldmangrouch

    oldmangrouch persona non grata

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    :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

    That is priceless!
     
  19. SheedSoNasty

    SheedSoNasty Well-Known Member

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    I'm starting to think he does this just to mess with message board nerds like us.
     
  20. Rodolfo

    Rodolfo Double Stamp>Triple Stamp

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    OK, Blazers fans, let's make a wager. O/U is 53.5. If Blazers go over, I'll change my Twitter background to an Oden dunk for 2010 playoffs.
    about 1 hour ago from web

    My response: HOW ABOUT A PICTURE OF HIM DUNKING ON YOU, BILLY?
     

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