The UFC's 20 worst nicknames

speeds · Oct 23, 2009

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UFC fighters are pretty tough guys. Maybe that's why they can get away with some of the lamest nicknames in the entire sports world. Don't believe us? Take a look at these 20 fighters who think their nickname rocks.

20. Frank Trigg (Twinkle Toes)

Frank (Twinkle Toes) Trigg: Honestly, it's hard to figure out how Trigg thought a nickname like Twinkle Toes would help him. It may be the lamest -- and least intimidating -- nickname for any MMA fighter.

19. Brad Imes (The Hillbilly Heartthrob)

This guy's nickname might as well be the Loch Ness Monster because it doesn't exist either. Hillbilly Heartthrob? What's next, the Redneck Rapscallion? Brad, please do UFC fans a favour and drop the nickname.

18. Wesley Correira (Cabbage)

Picking a vegetable nickname probably isn't a great place to start. But Correira could have picked a better veggie to name himself after than a Cabbage. Even Rutabaga sounds a little tougher. Tomato, not so much.

17. Keith Jardine (The Dean of Mean)

OK, we get the alliteration attempt. And The Dean of Mean does sort of roll off the tongue. But the UFC isn't college so rhyming dean with mean doesn't quite cut it.

16. Jeremy Horn (Gumby)

Gumby only works if you've got a sidekick named Pokey. Or if Eddie Murphy is playing him on SNL. Listen, if you really want to name yourself after a clay character, try something like Blockhead or Prickle, not Gumby dammit.

15. Renato Sobral (Babalu)

We thought maybe Sobral was a big fan of Dezi Arnez, who had a hit in the 1940s with a song called 'Babalu'. But, no, he carried his nickname from childhood, when he chewed a brand of bubble bum called Bubbaloo. So does that mean he's full of hot air?

14. Jason MacDonald (The Athlete)

You'd think it is a given that if you're a MMA fighter, you're an athlete. Why MacDonald feels the need to call himself The Athlete is beyond comprehension. The way things have gone for the Canadian lately, he might be better off calling himself The Punching Bag.

13. Joe Doerksen (El Dirte)

For the uninitiated, the nickname is pronounced El Dirt-ay, not Dirt. Whatever. It's still way too close to the bad-but-sometimes-funny David Spade character, Joe Dirt. Unless, of course, you want to be remembered as an idiot, mullet-wearing hick.

12. David Terrell (The Soul Assassin)

Can't really figure out what point Terrell is trying to make by calling himself Soul Assassin. Going with the simple but effective Assassin would have been fine but adding Soul conjures up images of a killer swaying to the strains of Ray Charles or Aretha Franklin.

11. Mike Swick (Quick)

Maybe Swick is Quick and the word certainly rhymes but this one has been beaten to death. Actually, if Swick had been smart about it, he would have spelled it Qwick, or something like that.

10. Vladimir Matyushenko (The Janitor)

Former American wrestling great Dave Schultz gave Matyushenko his nickname -- it really wasn't complimentary -- and it stuck. Here's hoping that's because Belarussian Matyushenko's command of the English language isn't very good.

09. Ricco Rodriguez (Suave)

Anyone who can remember the early 1990s will recall the extremely-bad Geraldo song, 'Rico Suave," which was included on Blender's list of the 50 worst songs ever. Rodriguez, inexplicably, decided to channel his inner Geraldo and had dubbed himself Suave. Some things just have no explanation.

08. Rich Clementi (No Love)

Apparently Clementi feels unloved and wants everyone to know about it. In actual fact, he belonged to "Team No Love" on The Ultimate Fighter 4 so the nickname is a natural. It's just not very good.

07. Josh Neer (The Dentist)

Does Neer not know everyone hates dentists? Hopefully the nickname is more about a previous occupation than a bad attempt at intimidating the opposition.

06. Josh Burkman (The People's Warrior)

If Burkman gave himself this nickname, he's presuming alot. Of course, invoking 'The People" as a source of nickname is reminiscent of Dwayne (The Rock) Johnson of WWE fame, who called himself "The People's Champion."

05. Joe Lauzon (J-Lau)

This might be the worst fighter nickname, rivaling only Kenny Florian for blandness. Yeah, it's a play on Jennifer Lopez's nickname, J-Lo, but does he really want to be thought of as a singing, dancing woman?

04. Kenny Florian (Ken-Flo)

This is just plain bad. Shortened names just don't work unless you're Alex Rodriguez (A-Rod) or Kenyon Martin (K-Mart). Ken-Flo sounds like a product you'd see advertised on late-night television, not the nickname for a MMA fighter.

03. Tamdan McCrory (The Barncat)

OK, McCrory likens himself to a scruffy, poop-in-the-garden kitty-cat. Wow, that's awfully frightening. Alley-cat would be a little tougher nickname. Not better, just tougher.

02. Elvis Sinosec (The King of Rock 'n Rumble)

Everyone knows a fighter named Elvis is going go with a King or Rock 'n Roll theme. But combining the two with a little twist -- the Rumble part -- makes the nickname too long and too lame.

01. Nate Quarry (Rock)

Time to get a little more creative, Nate. Rock's been done before -- the previously-mentioned Dwayne Johnson and Tim Raines immediately come to mind -- and even though it fits with the mining theme, it's passe. Dig a little deeper next time.
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BenDavis503 · Oct 23, 2009

17. Keith Jardine (The Dean of Mean)

OK, we get the alliteration attempt. And The Dean of Mean does sort of roll off the tongue. But the UFC isn't college so rhyming dean with mean doesn't quite cut it.
Click to expand...

What a moron, whoever wrote this article. Does he not know what alliteration means?

And you got the order wrong. Trigg is #1 and Nate is #20

speeds · Oct 23, 2009

^ Well it doesn't really say which one is the worst and which is the best so I figured they were counting down to the worst.

There is also a hint in the article that the UFC is a term interchangeable with MMA but I can't say for certain.

dpc · Oct 23, 2009

Hmm Dean of Mean and Babalu are two of my favorites

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The UFC's 20 worst nicknames

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The UFC's 20 worst nicknames

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