jlprk

Discussion in 'Blazers OT Forum' started by MickZagger, Nov 11, 2010.

  1. MickZagger

    MickZagger Well-Known Member

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    Was that guy serious when he said he was going to "retire" after 3,000 posts?

    I kinda miss that wack job.
     
  2. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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  3. jlprk

    jlprk The ESPN mod is insane.

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    Nice to know that someone remembers me. I'm trying to retire from posting. (I already forgot my password-- had to look it up to write this.)

    For years I have saved excerpts from message boards. On this board, I was putting a few new ones into my signature each week. (I may slightly rewrite them to improve them, I'm not admittin nuttin.) It's been 2-3 weeks since my last post (#3000), so here are the new ones I found since then.
    ===============
    A big contract brings expectations. Outlaw’s not paid Spiderman’s salary to be Peter Parker.

    Outlaw had a masterpiece of terrible play— knocking a rebound loose from Favors, grabbing for a ball while standing out of bounds, barely flailing in man defense, not rotating, forcing the last shot with 6 seconds left when Morrow was wide open. And much, much more. A tour-de-force. No one can be that bad and last a month in the NBA; something has to be wrong with him. I think.

    Did you see the backboard block his shot? That was way up there! Would have gone straight through the hoop.

    He sat down next to the coach. Probably kissing up.

    This board. The complaining about the complaining is becoming worse than the complaining.

    I thought Outlaw was good before but now I see him play a lot , I noticed he moves weird. This guy is just plain straight shooter but no passing skill cause he don’t have vision. I think this guy have bad eyes maybe color blind too. I think this guy also have poor time awareness, that goes with poor vision.

    What bothers me about Outlaw is that I scan his line and hardly ever see a number above 4 (besides shots attempted).

    I hereby revoke your license to do anything other than sit on the couch. Your computer winced with embarassment while you typed that. My 11 month old could type smarter, with her 4-word vocabulary. You should apologize to every Blazer fan, alive and/or dead.

    You think he's a good player? I'm just going to assume you've missed every game this season.

    If stupidity hurt you'd go through a lot of aspirin

    I've just been calming people down all game long, and part of that process was mocking you since you're so upset. Feeling calmer?

    Don't you have a family to get to tonight or no? I guess trolling the message boards is a full-time job in this recession.

    Do I need to spell it out for you next time, or post it multiple times? I'm here to help you understand, if you need me.

    Our guy allegedly guarding him made a big effort to take his cold hands out of his pockets and raise his arms. Then he went back to watching the game like me, except I had my hands in my popcorn.

    I have offered statistical facts along with my opinion. You have offered opinions disguised as statistics.

    Well, interesting range of opinions, from the sane to the insane. To those of you who bothered to seriously discuss the issues, thanks for agreeing with me. For the 4 or 5 trolls- get screwed.

    Please save this thread so we can go back and laugh at it from time to time.

    A good couch can make a game good no matter how bad it is. McMillan has to go.

    it is glaringly apparent that
    A. you are under 15 years old
    B. you have never played higher than High School JV
    C. you don't understand the nuances of the game
    D. all of the above

    1. Is it too early for me to criticize Coach McSlowdown on these 4 points?
    2. Roy's individual defense is very subpar if he wants to be a superstar.
    3. LMA still giving up way to early in the post
    4. Poor Dre Miller just doesn't fit.

    Once again you have confirmed your total illiteracy about economic matters and everything else. You are living proof that continued inbreeding leads to genetically altered offspring. In fact a recent CIA investigation, funded by the FED of course (who else?), has confirmed what most of us on this site have long suspected. Your father is indeed your brother and your daughter is indeed your sister. The men in the white coats are waiting outside your door to transport you to Kentucky to join your stablemates. Better hurry up! Trot into the glue factory or we'll need to get out the straightjacket.

    we shouldn't blame any of our economic whose on Wall Street, but on Ourselves

    is your last name Dufus?

    Stern is good because the players are to stupid to polece themselves.

    Look at the bright side: at least we get to see our bench get some extensive playing time.

    You cannot hope to rid your team of knucklheads until you stop spelling it that way.

    ha ha you funny boy!! You complain that our scouting staff sucks cuz they draft injury prone players like Elliot Williams and you promote D BLAIR!!! you can't have it both ways you funny boy.

    This is sad. I broke my patella just reading it.

    After Oden, they were certainly not going to draft another knee problem so they passed on Blair. He turned out to be a fine player. That made us take a chance on a known knee problem in Eliot Williams and we're back to being screwed. You see the pattern here? Next year we will pass up a player with a knee problem and he will become a fine player.

    Hey, even the Red Sox overcame the curse. Of course it took like 87 years to do it. Hey it's only been 33 since we won the title. We still have time.

    I was wrong and I need to admit it. I gotta eat crow, just like the tree in the forest still makes a noise even if nobody hears it.

    You wouldn't have been here before they invented the mouse. Back then, to navigate on a computer, you had to know how to read.

    Have you been at the Koolaid jar again? PLEASE....see a psychiatrist soon, you may be a danger to yourself or others. Amazing to think that you beat out a billion other sperm.

    Oh, I get it. You seen one of those stickers that had Oden "pi$$ing" on the Blazers logo. Don't believe everything you see, silly boy, especially your daddy's name on your birth certificate.

    65% of voters say Rajon Rondo is the best point guard in the NBA, which tells you a hell of a lot about who is being polled.

    I remember that game. Which is another way of saying "man I'm getting old".

    They're not sleep walking, they're preserving their energy for the 4th quarter.

    This game sucks! Today sucks. The whole week sucks. Point me to the nearest cliff.

    All's well that ends well, but it may not end well next time. So a better saying is--Ignore close calls and you'll be a goner.

    Darn tootin' means regular tootin', only darner.

    We will either win or lose, IMO.

    Even if we win, it's fools' gold. We're a bad team.

    It's not clear why you think you know better than me what you meant to say, but you are wrong about that in any case.

    I'll repeat myself again, even more slowly, just for your benefit...

    I was happy we won till I read your post. So I checked whether we outscored them in addition to winning, and we did, so I'm happy again.

    Michael Jordan once said, "I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." We've been winning, and we're one of the worst at failing. If things don't change, we won't succeed.

    Are you kidding me? I am being completely serious. Is the front office/coach actually playing a practical joke? This can't be realistic. Our center...our STARTING center, is Timofey Mozgov. Can anyone even tell me who this guy is and please spell his name? Timofey? This man is averaging 15 minutes and he is literally doing nothing with that time. He is averaging 1.5 pts and 2.5 boards. This is the best we can muster up? Really? Maybe I can call my grandmother up and see if she wants the job?

    yawn the board idiot is drinking again!!!!!

    Man another season.. Another 6 beers down... Another dissappointing loss.. and another potential threat to the big screen with the missed free throws.. I Swear I was about to break the screen with a full can of beer about 7 times.. We need Another baller in the building..

    Stoudemire is capable of being pathetic on the boards. Let's hope he rises to this potential.

    It's time for buttpatting, too soon for backpatting.

    we should sue the wolves for 3rd degree attempted basketball.

    You might say they took a leap off a a 60' cliff into 35 degree water, and we responded with a 100' leap into 75 degree water.

    I like what i've seen from the team as a collective whole in the back half of this 4th quarter

    Oberto just flew in yesterday from Argentina and now he's in a game. He doesn't know the offensive or defensive sets, so it's like having Outlaw back.

    Great move. Nate must have sat Nic because he was hogging all the rebounds.

    I think the reason the bench looks good is that they don't know Nate's system yet and push tempo.

    If we can hit our shots, we have a great chance of winning. If the shots aren't falling, it will be a long game.

    There's a reason that some men are GMs and others deliver pizza.

    So what, they lost. Look, if the world ends and everyone dies, will anyone notice? Lighten up.

    Isn't a hypocrite a large zoo animal in a huge wooden box? Cause if it is of course he knows what it is! He goes to visit his mom every weekend and enjoy some hot elephant ears.

    I'm a little guy because I'm Asian. Or maybe I'm Asian because I'm a little guy. Not to mention I'm angry all the time.

    Vegas has a word for people that don't use facts and statistics but instead their opinions and feelings: Suckers.

    Man. You really do have some self-esteem issues. I'm done smacking you around for the night.

    In the open court with nobody on him, Rudy's brilliant. In the halfcourt he can't reach escape velocity and he's forcing awkward passes with defenders on him. The slower the game revolves, the worse he looks.

    You make a compelling case, but I am uncompelled.

    Many of you Blazer fans own property in Fantasy Land.

    You cry wolf only so many times before your voice becomes a howl. Take a nap and dream of the Blazers drafting Durant.

    Most everybody who is a Blazer fans expectations over the last few years have been essentially dashed, and a lot of fans haven't got over it yet, because it may not be over. It's still going on. Right now the whole fan base is in a hangover because what has happened to the team over the last couple of years. It's no wonder everyones attitude is bad. Everybody is fucking pissed off it didn't turn out better than it did. That is reality. Because the team is still being held up to those expectations, which were very high, the fans desire a better performance from the players. Perhaps those expectations are unreasonable. But what kind of expectations should you have if your desire is for your favorite team, to win the NBA finals? Ha ha ha just wait until the team wins a game. Then the world will be afire with the glory of the Blazers, on the way to a championship with all the future all stars playing on this team!

    when I come here, the thought that always crosses my mind is "I wonder what everyone is whining about today?"

    Oden is a walking, talking injury machine. Some all-brain, no-body creature on the Injury Planet invented this humanoid-shaped perpetual motion machine using their evil laws of physics.

    Just think of me as the psychologist and you as the lab rat. Lab rats die so that we may live. And yet, here you are through my Eternal Mercy.

    I'm framing this thread and coming to your office. I'll hang it under your doctorate in explaining things away.

    Could be worse, could be someone who has a whistle when he pronounces his S's. In this modern age of iPods and Bluetooth headphones, some guy pierces your ears who you would never have noticed in the old days of car stereo speakers.

    Setting a screen reminds me of Einstein's Theory of Relativity. If we have brick above ground then for distant observer earth should look more heavy than same earth with same brick on the ground. but which part of that system keeps all that energy? Here is my take on it. If I carry the brick to the top of a tower, the total mass of the brick and Earth will be ever so slightly more than before, because of the energy added to the combination in the form of gravitational potential. The source of that energy is my muscles, and I will be slightly lighter as a result of having expended that energy. there is no absolute frame of reference. therefore, maybe, from a long way away, a brick on the Earth surface, might weigh less than a brick that is raised out of that space-time warp field created by the Earth, say to 2 million miles away from Earth.
     
  4. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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    I was just joking, I know who you are, online.
     
  5. BLAZER PROPHET

    BLAZER PROPHET Well-Known Member

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    Thanks.

    Speaking of wack jobs, stop posting about him and maybe he'll go away for good. That said, as unpopular as he was, and for as far out of mind he was, his posts were amusing.
     
  6. jlprk

    jlprk The ESPN mod is insane.

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    I knew you were joking, and I don't post to another board. This was the only one I used for 13 months--3000 posts without ever starting a thread. I'm not retiring just to go back to ESPN, which sucks compared to this board.

    I didn't know Prophet hates me. I thought only Boob and Crandc dislike me, since they're the only ones I ever took on here. Prophet says the board dislikes me, which is BS. I was tied for the most points in "The Official S2 -1/+1 vote away game" thread until Post #131. Prophet's just judging me on his own politics.

    Okay, since I'm posting, I come with presents--more shtuff. At first I was writing a serious signature. Starting March 24, I went with excerpts from boards.
    ===================
    When you criticize McMillan for his programmed substitutions, remember why he feels impelled to do this. Pritchard has not made consolidation trades. McMillan must develop about 10 young guys with potential, and that takes playing time for each. He objects every time yet another youngster is forced upon him, most recently Mills over Udoka.

    changed 11/7/09 to
    something else

    changed unknown date to
    This, too, shall pass because it is what it is.

    changed 1/15/10 to
    MUUAHAHAHAHA !! My strategy is working impeccably!!
    You fools don't know who is making you win? Pleased to meet you! Glad you guessed my name!

    changed 2/3/10 to
    I've been told that my body was created in the image of God. That must be why women are too intimidated to ask me for dates. I've also been told that my gift for humility and my stare is intimidating to oldtime posters. I don't mean to stare at the little people, but whoa, just look at you!

    changed morning of 2/11/10 to
    I live by Antonio Harvey's credo. "Another day, another chance to prove to the league I ain’t no chump."

    changed 10:30 pm same day to
    Feb. 11, 10 pm. I just read some basketball blog. Okay it was Bleacher's Report. "I'm saying X. I'm not saying Y, but [blah blah blah]." Look--If you have any writing ability, you shouldn't have to quantify your statements. If you have to say what you're not saying so readers will say the right thing about what you said, then you're not saying what you're saying well enough. Say what you mean and mean what you say. If you can't say what you're saying without saying what you're not saying then just don't say nuttn'.

    changed next day back to
    I live by Antonio Harvey's credo. "Another day, another chance to prove to the league I ain’t no chump."

    changed 2/14/10 evening to
    changed 2/17/10 to
    No Roy, no Oden...last third of the season...The time for talk is past! Time for action! Let's go with what we have! Move it!

    changed 2/18 to
    The definition of "consolidation trade" is not just any 2 for 1. The player acquired should give permanent help and be a tradeable asset. If he's age 35, and stays 2 months, we didn't consolidate, we just gave away 2 of last season's top 6 or 7 players.

    changed 2/28 to
    Now that Andre Miller got 52 points, he's tied with Brandon Roy for 2nd place Blazer all time. At 51 points twice, Geoff Petrie is tied with himself for 4th place. No wonder Petrie never scored 52. He would have knocked himself down to 5th. Would you rather sit on the record books as 4 and 4, or 4 and 5?

    changed 3/5 to
    I am, if not a saint, at least a humanitarian.
     
  7. jlprk

    jlprk The ESPN mod is insane.

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    changed 3/24 to
    And if they fire KP then they'll have to bring in a guy that SWEARS ON HIS MOM that he would have drafted Durant given the same situation. SWEARS ON HIS MOTHER!!!

    changed 3/29 to
    It was obvious this would happen. You just had to add 2 and 2 and get 4 and hope for a good 4.

    All things being equal, on a level playing field there is no such thing as addition by subtraction.

    changed 4/4 to
    I admire your pessimism. You da Grinch.

    Anyone who quotes Darth Vader is okay in my book.

    Like I said that was in response to someone else. When you responded to my post, I had no idea what you were talking about.

    changed 4/8 to
    Jarrett Jack always looks like he's about to cry or sneeze or both.

    We should start a letter writing complain.

    changed 4/9 to
    I see RIGHT through your flattery when you say You, Sir, are a moron. No one EVER calls me Sir.

    Literally literally? Or figuratively literally?

    changed 4/12 to
    While Telfair may turn out decent, he is Stephan Marbury at best, who is better than Steve Francis. I can think of 15 point guards off the top of my head I'd rather have than Francis, so I don't miss Telfair.

    If Kevin Pritchard doesn't get fired, I will name my baby Megatron.

    changed 4/18 to
    Okay call me a conspiracy theory person but keep this in mind..... Only 7 teams have won the championship since David Stern came into the league in 1984. Thats 26 years people and they all come from big markets. Before David Stern came into the league and after the NBA started to expand which the seperation is 13 years; 9 different teams won the championship. Do the math.

    changed 4/23 to
    Our young players are all rounding into square pegs.

    Bob Akamian has a face meant for radio. His chin qualifies as a triple-double.

    If I say something that can be taken two ways, and one of them upsets or offends you; I meant the other one.

    changed 4/26 to
    I wish the players would stop getting in their way and just let the refs ref. Do they think we came to see THEM?

    changed 4/27 to
    Sure, the refs practiced equality, but was it equal on both sides or just one?

    They are not a better team. We just made them a better team.

    Everything to be sad has been said.

    changed 5/15 to
    David Lee is a sieve on defense. He gives 110% effort but it only adds up to 50%.

    Nate likes "units" but Bayless is a lone gunman.

    Even you can learn to post better! They have computers at Jack'n The Box.

    changed 6/12 to
    I'm a pitcher, son. I can bean you at 90 mph if you're running toward me fast.

    The answer is a definite yes. But then I could be wrong.

    It's over 50-50 that we win, if things go right.

    changed 6/19 to
    You don't cut off your nose to spit on your face.

    You are making yourself look like you are here just to argue, to disagree with everyone. That is why you are white trash.

    I don't consider him worthless, I just think his worth doesn't exist. But I'll be thrilled if something crazy happens like Bigfoot is discovered or Oden proves to have value.

    Stern wanted his two largest market teams in the Finals, and to go 7 games. Well guess what folks? What an incredible turn of calls err I mean events.

    What in the name of the Seven Mad Gods Who Rule the Sea is the relevance of this info ????!!

    changed 6/24 to
    i see the blazers have aquired about mo williams

    This team is an early second round pick away from winning it all.

    Send Bayless back to Pacers along with our #22 for their #10. They need a tweener PG with short arms, no shot, and waxed brows. Then we use #34 to draft a Euro. Draft and Stash baby....60% of the time it works every time.

    My desire for love is he's a great rebounder and passer who can score low or high.

    changed 7/6 to
    Before the draft, when asked who his best player was, Wolves GM Kahn said, we don't have one and thats what we need to get a hold of.

    Martell was finally coming into his own, jermaine oneal anyone?

    Why would Gomes or anyone re-sign with the Wolves? Once a wolfe is freed, it runs.

    if you want to argue that Harrington is a better player that's your right. It's also a complete joke and an embarrassment.

    No changes needed. We just need to stay healthy and learn how to win.

    changed 7/11 to
    Great for Durant that he wants to win a title, but so do all of the other NBA teams, except the Clippers.

    Millsap is only 6'8"....undersized.....he is no Boozer

    Anyone want to bet how many seconds Oden plays next year?

    If playing time is the mother's milk of a young player's development, Pendergraph was very well-fed this past season when he was thrust into a prominent spot
    --Kevin Arnovitz, TrueHoop

    changed 7/20 to
    You're a pesky little guy, eh? I already answered that. How much did you pay for that degree? Are there refunds available?

    You're feeling even more inadequate than I thought. You're a cutie when you get flustered.

    Am I going MAD, or did the word "think" escape your lips? You were not hired for your brains, you hippopotamic land mass.

    If you're right and Oden is a bust then SURELY NBA executives know that and won't trade for him. Conversely, if you're wrong then we'd be trading away our best shot. So either way you're wrong and I'm right, as usual.

    changed 7/25 to
    Clowns like LeBron and William Wesley are influencing Chris Paul to run off with the circus.

    Wheaaaaa !!! What will these crazy fingers type next?

    Did not upset me FAMS, I was just being silly. You know I love you like the little sister I never had.

    Does Kahn think this is Nintendo Ice Hockey? Building a team of Fats(4s) + Skinnies(1s)?

    adthe just frozed

    changed 8/9 to
    Remember, the tree falls both ways.

    The point wasn't that Lebron left Cleveland for a team with better prospects that have people so incensed. It's the classless way he showed himself to be a beta when everyone thought he was an alpha dog. LeBron apologists, address those two points.

    I went to the University of Idaho for my first year of College, and yes one of the reasons I left for Portland State was that the only thing to do on a weekend was drink (or a weekday for that matter). I think it's a bummer Boise State thinks they're so much better then everyone else in the WAC (granted they are but they don't have to act like it)

    changed 8/19 to
    Like I'm not going to say this to be rude but you are a moron.

    you Hornets live in a city 20 feet under sea level how smart are you?

    Bayless is a thinking man first, before acting, go see Sherlock Holmes if you don't get what I'm saying.

    Asking whether something occurred or not is not the same as asking a hypothetical question.

    This is what happens when you don't live in a real state. California is not a state. It is an area at the rear end of the US that no one gives a crap about.

    changed 8/26 to
    Think of it like Whack-o-Mole. If Team A on the left have a team of two guys for the 48 seconds and guy one whacks 17 moles in 30 seconds and hands over the mallet and guy two whacks an additional 10 moles. Meanwhile team B has one guy whack moles for 40 seconds because his partner is a three year old girl, so he whacks 18 moles in 40 seconds and hands the mallet over and his 3 year old whacks 2 more moles. Which team won? 27 vs. 20. Sure the guy on Team B whacks the most moles of everyone with 18 moles, but do we go around saying his 18 moles makes him one of the best partner whackers for the day? No. In reality he's not the not that good at whacking compared to better whackers that just didn't have the opporunitities because they had better partners. He just has inflated overall stats because he had to be out there longer than everyone else so his 3 year old wasn't out there for 15 seconds bringing the team even further down. It's like the guy who whacked moles for 40 seconds instead of 30. Sure, his arms got a little extra tired in those extra 10 seconds, but it's only 40 seconds, so his fatigue would make that extra 10 minutes 99.9% of producitivy, or no difference in moles. So with LMA, you get what you get, you just have inflated "Per Game" stats due to his playing so many extra minutes with the injuries.

    changed 8/28 to
    I agree...as far as him under achieving in the playoffs...but he is still a better NBA player than

    Batum...he is too strong for him...he would do him in on the street...in practice....and in games...is all im saying..

    Wait you are over valueing Batum sooooo much....man get real...Harrington has been in the league 14 years...to say a guy that has only been in the league 2 yrs ...is laughable ...thats common sense......study more then it will look like you actually know something about basketball... ...there is no comparison...Harrington is a better player...an any analyst would say that or GM or owner.... thats disrespectful to Harrington saying sum "green" player is better...... this is comedy...am I on the t.v. show punked right now???

    changed 9/5 to
    Costa is what he is IMO..

    Where were you in the 1st grade when we all learned this? Changing into dry pants for the 3rd time that day?

    For someone who works with numbers and stares at certificates on his office walls, you sure talk in circles. Weird. Very weird. Too weird.

    Be impossible not to see a post of yours now after your repeated absurd posts and not think, "Need another banana?"

    Coo-coo for coco puffs...Coo-coo for coco puffs...

    changed 9/15 to
    Mike Barrett is a Blazer blowhorn.

    You still arguing with me? This is child's play to a giant.

    I really don't understand your question. Was that suppose to be zinger? Are you attempting to own me?

    You claim that nobody else on the board admits when they're wrong. Here's your chance to show us how it's done.

    changed 9/20 to
    Check back in about 5 or 7 years people. That's when the NBA will return. Maybe. Portland will just be another version of the Washington Generals.

    After you're done saying, “Aha, I told you so,” I have this boulder for you to push up this hill...forever.

    Troll Alert! Troll Alert! Troll Alert! Troll Alert! Troll Alert! Troll Alert!

    Remember when you were trying to get everybody to believe that aliens built the Sun Gate at Tiwanaku, Bolivia? One of your sparkling comebacks was a statement about all your playing and coaching experience.

    changed 10/3 to
    Kobe will start the season unlike Oden...they will 3 peat this year...like I told yall Jordan averaged 20 a game at the age of 40...so grab your popcorn and wait it out...Kobe's not getting old

    I got up too early to try and reason with you.

    What, do you miss Outlaw like some old worthless family dog?

    I know, I'm just making small talk during commercials.

    Come on, you may the stupidest knife in the drawer, but even you should come out of the closet about this.

    changed 10/5 to
    saying, if Oden plays 72 games, is like saying, if the Wolves win the Finals.

    You guys are going to have to end the thread, because I have to leave.

    I guess having OSUBlazerfan brag about having you on ignore isn't such an insult.

    saying "pre-injury" with Derek Anderson is like saying "pre-Big Bang" for the universe. He blew out his knee as a college senior, and I'd be shocked if he was healthy at OSU before he got to Kentucky.

    changed 10/14 to
    It just wouldn't be time for the season to start without a quote about how we will run more this season. We are set now... the universe is aligned... lets bring on the games!

    You are always wrong on everything, but to stick to a positive note, I should compliment you for always sticking to your guns, come hell or high water. In combat, you'd be a dead man by now.

    If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, walks like a duck....then Lebron is a Douche.

    Come on Faker, Tricks are for Kids

    I'm done smacking you around for the night.

    changed 10/18 to
    Preseason is sucking. I was the only one chalking out my spot last night for the championship parade.

    Oh, Christmas! We have a coach who other teams ran layup clinics on us last year like they had free tickets

    You're not only boring, but you're a Me-Too. A dual threat. Zzzzzzz

    This board has no cash prize for troll of the decade, so move on.

    I love the Sloan quote on Matthews. There's a guy who obviously hates answering questions. It seems like any of his questions or statements could be punctuated with the word "asshole!" and it would fit perfectly. Like "we have to play whoever we're playing (asshole!)."
     
  8. BLAZER PROPHET

    BLAZER PROPHET Well-Known Member

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    Geeze, a monster has been unleashed.
     
  9. Denny Crane

    Denny Crane It's not even loaded! Staff Member Administrator

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    tl;dr
     
  10. MickZagger

    MickZagger Well-Known Member

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    This guy's nuttier than a squirrel turd.
     
  11. jlprk

    jlprk The ESPN mod is insane.

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    One last thing...thanks, Prophet. You are the coolest guy on the board, and please don't feel guilty about what you said. I come here just to read your posts.
     
  12. Natebishop3

    Natebishop3 Don't tread on me!

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    What about my posts?
     
  13. SlyPokerDog

    SlyPokerDog Woof! Staff Member Administrator

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    Dear jlprk,

    Thank you for your interest in continuing to post here at SportsTwo.com. We have reviewed the above post, and while it was somewhat entertaining, unfortunately we are unable to offer you a position at this time. Should you find another open thread that suits your interest, you would be welcome to submit an updated and may we suggest more sane post in the future. We wish you the best of luck in your forum search.

    Best regards,

    Sly
     
  14. Natebishop3

    Natebishop3 Don't tread on me!

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    This is why you're in charge of HR.
     
  15. TripTango

    TripTango Quick First Step

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    Wait... who is Prophet?
     
  16. MARIS61

    MARIS61 Real American

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    Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back in aught-two, shortly after Al Gore invented the internet, I typed Blazers into the search engine and came across a message board forum, the first I had ever seen. I read it for hours. Most of the posts were childish, idiotic, or simply boorish drivel. I was about to leave this forum which resembled a graffiti covered boxcar in a Compton railyard when....................I came across a post by BobWhitsitt'sGhost.

    It was like falling into a cesspool but then finding a winning lottery ticket in your pocket when you climb out.

    Here was a guy who could write. The jaunty prose, the barbed satire, the dry wit, the endearing humanity weaving it all together.

    It was the revelation that, hey, not everyone here is a moron, which inspired me to post my first post on a message board, and our paths have continually crossed on boards over the years, BBF, ESPN, 2 or 3 before that but forget the names.

    Here was a guy who knew what a forum was for, and how to best serve mankind through regular posting.

    His posts are read in many nations, by many world leaders. Shapers and thinkers are forever requesting audience with him to discuss the deeper meanings hidden to all but a few in his somber soliloquies. It has been said his words could heal the world's worst wounds, if only they could be read aloud by all living beings in unison.

    He has long been the undefeated King of Forums, and there are no serious contenders.

    When he does retire, or abruptly disappears from the board without explanation as some of us will do when we die, a black hole of despair will no doubt begin to grow on our screens, first as a tiny flaw in the pixels but quickly growing and then completely filling the frame. Some will flee in terror, others will weep and tremble. Many will confess their sins in vain. There will be no salvation.

    A Tip of The Cap to jlprk.
     
    Haakzilla likes this.
  17. Natebishop3

    Natebishop3 Don't tread on me!

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    I believe this is what is commonly referred to as a "bromance."
     
  18. MARIS61

    MARIS61 Real American

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    See line 2 of my post "Most of the posts were childish, idiotic, or simply boorish drivel."
     
  19. Haakzilla

    Haakzilla Well-Known Member

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    Nice post. +1 :clap:
     
  20. Natebishop3

    Natebishop3 Don't tread on me!

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    If you can't have fun on the internet, where can you? The internet is not for you to understand Maris. You were obviously alive when radio was the big "to do". What was it like when Orson Welles scared the world with his version of War of the Worlds?
     

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