Bill Simmons KILLS us in his latest revised "predictions"

"we will be lucky to finish 500." He has denver and suns getting 7+8 seed with 43 and 41 wins. I think we can d better then that.

CAN WE PLEASE BEAT THE FUCKING CELTICS

9. PORTLAND
Preseason Prediction: 52 wins (5th)
Revised Prediction: 41 wins

Note: Dark days for Blazers fans: Another Greg Oden season-ending injury (the third in four years) coupled with Brandon Roy's knees finally going south, and if that's not bad enough, Durant being Durant. Rip City needs a pick-me-up. Since I'm the master of discounting the Blazers and having them shove it in my face, maybe the following two paragraphs will help turn things around.

Before the season, the Rip City Soccer Moms bullied me into picking them for 52 wins. I sipped their Kool-Aid, mainly because they were holding my head back and pouring it down my throat, but still. I even spent $1 on Wesley Matthews in my fantasy auction as an olive branch for infuriating Blazers fans by making fun of his absolutely absurd $34 million contract. And you know what? That's what killed their season! They needed my barbs! They needed my unwavering disbelief in their team! They needed me to write things like "The Celtics passed on Brandon Roy in 2006 because they didn't think his knees would hold up -- maybe they were right," and "If the Blazers had extended Nate McMillan's contract last summer, he would have managed Roy's minutes more carefully instead of running him into the ground," and "I'm fine with calling Nicolas Batum a defensive specialist as long as you add that he also specializes in getting torched by Kevin Durant," and "Aaron Spelling didn't overrate his daughter's acting more than Blazers fans overrated Rudy Fernandez," and "Let's face it: the comparisons of Oden to Sam Bowie are actually an insult to Bowie at this point." Rip City, you'll be lucky to break .500. And you know it.

(My work is done here, Blazers fans. Enjoy your 14-game winning streak and your Ewing Theory run without Roy.)

Reason No. 14,731 I love the NBA: Kahn protesting that Portland knowingly traded him damaged goods after Martell Webster's ailing back required surgery last month … even though this clip from the 2010 playoffs posted on YouTube on April 26. I can't resist … KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Funny piece -- nice find, MIXman!

 

i find it interesting he thinks the 8th seed gets 41 wins while the 7th seed get 43.

i think 46 for 8th seed personally

 

"we will be lucky to finish .500"

On the Road maybe.

 

Denver looked awful last might, when Carmelo goes they will fall off a cliff IMO, even though it already appears Melo is just cruising

 

Who doesn't get torched by Kevin Durant?

 

i know who passes on him during drafts...

gms who hate scoring titleS

 

Bill Simmons is a funny guy.

FWIW - Hollinger's playoffs predictions (based on games played so far) has us 6th in the conference with the Thunder heading to the lottery... even if we are 0-2 to the Thunder this year.

http://espn.go.com/nba/hollinger/playoffodds

 

Yeah, but who cares what someone intelligent like John Hollinger thinks? Billl Simmons is a funny guy and an attention whore, so everyone will read his article and ignore Hollinger's much more astute analysis.

BNM.

 

You guys are missing a key point in that piece:

He's all but admitting he's trying to do that reverse jinx thing he's done with us the past few years.

Lighten up people and save the angry e-mails.

 

Who is upset? We said he is funny.

 

Well i assume Mixum ...

 

We need to take our anger out on someone...

 

I'm free this afternoon.

 

yeah, but he reversed reversed jinx it b/c he told us that he was reverse jinxing us. What an asshole!

 

It would suck if this site got in trouble because people post articles without linking to them.

 

trouble from who, teh interwebs police?

 

Denny set up the mailing address and phone number for the registrar to an In-n-Out in Bakersfield, CA. haahah..good luck!

 

I like how the season is turning then...