Yeah, the parties do kind of suck. Usually no booze, and you are stuck talking to a bunch of strangers you have no interest in. I happen to really like kids, so I wind up spending all the time hanging out with them. I think it kind of annoys the other parents because they think it makes them look bad/uninvolved, but I just find kids much more interesting. Our older boy has been really shy up until the past year or so. So for his first big birthday party it was kind of cool seeing him deal with being the center of attention.
Suddenly I remember drawing this about 8 months ago for a shirt design. Had written underneath it, "Nobody came to Jeff's party."
I would have your brother review the list of people he invited. Him being the only one in the PTA throws up alot of red flags for me. 1. I know that when I was without kids, I would not have placed as much importance on it. 2. With some that had kids, buying a present may have been an issue. If they were not close with the parents and kids, it can be rough spending money every weekend on presents that may or may not even be liked. 3. For my kid to go to a birthday party, it has to fit in with our schedule. Our kids are very young and I am a stay at home dad. We get alot of time together, yet our weekends are still reserved for the zoo, Children's Museum, and other activities that feed thier imagination and family bonding. As they get older, my wife and I are probably going to get more protective of our family weekends. If my kids have 19 classmates each, I am definitely not going to be going to 38 extra birthday parties a year.
I think he invited 6 or 7 kids. He says he's inviting the whole class next time, but I think that's an incredibly bad idea. I wouldn't go to 19 parties either. I don't know what being a PTA member has to do with much, other than he's involved in his kids' school life as much as he can. Is there a stigma about guys joining the PTA? Anyway, I don't think he was annoyed that people didn't show. He's annoyed that they said the would, and then didn't.
Nothing wrong with being on the PTA and your brother is doing the right thing. With the other parents not participating, it looks bad on them IMO. If they said yes to being there, he has every right to be pissed. Agree that you definitely do not invite the whole class.
I would tell him to concentrate on just making it a special day. When I was growing up, I could sense when my parent's tried too hard and it ruined those occasions for me. The few times I had non-family at birthdays or overspending for Christmas come to mind. The times I cherish the most were the birthdays with my family and little things like my mom bringing cupcakes and cider to school. Had a big family, so just seeing cousins that I infrequently got to see was enough as was seeing my mom during school hours.
That just sucks. I remember as a kid being on the other end of this kind of stuff. I was hardly ever invited to parties, and the few times I was I stood out like a sore thumb. My parents weren't part of the "clique" that the other parents were and didn't hang out with the other parents. Of course, the ironic thing is my dad was the only father who actually would take the time to be our coach for sports.
I'm not a parent, so this is not obvious to me but...why are so many children's parties held in "gymnastics places?" I had never heard that before and when I was kid, that wasn't the case for me or any of the kids I knew. But in this thread, 3-4 people have referenced birthday parties in "gymnastics places." I understand that it's a large area, but that still seems a little random...parks, event centers, pizza places, etc, are where I'd have assumed parents would use/rent large spaces for such things.
Gymnastics places are a major improvement over the pizza places/Chuck E Cheeses of my childhood. Much more exercise and interaction between the kids, instead of staring at video games and being stuck at the table. Also, because you rent a time slot, you have to be done in 90 minutes with the whole thing, meaning it can't string on interminably. At 90 minutes, you shrug and look at the other parents and get the fuck out of there. I just wish they served beer to the adults there.....
Oh, I see...the kids actually do gymnastics. I didn't realize that, I thought it was just for the space. That's cool.
When I was 7, I had my birthday at an ice skating rink, invited everyone in my class, and had everyone make a donation to the Make a Wish Foundation in my name as my present.
My dumb ex-wife rented the kid's field at the indoor soccer arena for a Saturday afternoon birthday party when my son was about 7 to 10. He's 19 now. I kept telling her, all those boys (including ours) have Saturday morning soccer games, they'll be too tired to come, hold it the day before or after. Nooooo...she knows everything, so she spends a lot on it. Well one kid shows and to have a game, she has to play (new hubby arrived halfway through and played too). As I barely recall, she passed out trying to keep up with the two boys, who liked it. They weren't the ones who suffered (heh heh). As the TV show would be titled nowadays...Real Father Knows Best.