How about remote control expanding and contracting rims. The diameter of the rims expands or contracts by half an inch depending on which team is shooting at them.
Loosening rims. I kinda suspect that POR, SAC, and BOS already do this. You tend to see a lot more wedgies and kind bounces off these rims because they are so soft. Could be an interesting statistical study for some bored grad student to see if there's significance.
Great topic. To yuyuza's point, I think the things you would do to utilize it may give you away. For a "soft rim" to work you have to have a certain shot profile, right? "Shooter's arc" vs. "Clyde jumper", for instance? If the shooters all started taking high-arcing shots, which might help at home but be a detriment on the road, you'd probably notice. I think BOS using the "dead spots" in the old Garden was one way, but that's like learning how to play balls hit off the Green Monster more than cheating. While I'm thinking about it, WTF is up with Boston teams and skirting the rules??!!
Raise the basket for the visiting team by 1 inch. Again, this would have to be done by remote control. Even a half inch would be enough to throw off the visiting team's shooting percentage.
Station Blazer dancers with inflatable bras near the endline under the opponents' hoop. Press a button and instant Dolly Partons abound for distraction purposes.
Okay, how about inflatable sneakers to gain a little height and jumping advantage? Install a trap door in the court to have certain opposing players disappear at key moments. Have the blimp drop eggs on opposing players. Make the rims out of clear plastic with LED lighting that can be turned on to color them orange, but turned off to go into stealth mode when an opponent is getting ready to shoot. Have trick planks in the floor at strategic locations that can be triggered remotely to give the opponent a Clark Griswold-style whack in the face. Have the HCP streak the court at the opponent's end.
I remember hearing that UTH tightened up the springs on their rims back in the day. And also that they inflated their balls to a higher-than-usual air pressure.
We're trying to cheat, not inflict serious emotional trauma on thousands of innocent men, women and children.
