I have a heavy burden on my heart and I need to put something out there. This is long, and I apologize for it now. The point of this is more to raise awareness than anything and to vent. For those who didn't/don't know, my wife suffered through 4 HG (Hyperemesis Gravidarum) pregnancies (resulting in 3 kids and 1 miscarriage). For those who aren't familiar with HG, check out http://www.helpher.org/ which deals with HG. My wife was hospitalized at least once (one pregnancy 4 times) with each time receiving 4 different medications and intravenous fluids (each visit was at least 2 liters of fluids and such) due to severe dehydration... For many, HG doesn't end with the end of the pregnancy (birth or miscarriage)... Many develop PTSD. Last night in the UK, one of the founding members of my wife's support group lost her battle with HG PTSD and threw herself in front of a train... She leaves behind 3 and 1 year old daughters. She was 32. This is the content from the one of the other founding members of the support group my wife is a member of... My wife wrote this today on her facebook wall in response: My response to her was that she is I also shared the post from the group to the support group for those who support these women who we call HG Warriors... Those who know me know I don't cry easily and I'm sitting here at work seriously fighting back tears... I just needed to get this off my chest. Sorry
...wow, that is some heavy shit, hammer. ...don't know what words I could possibly offer that could somehow make you feel any better...so I won't even try. ...hope things turn around for you and your bride.
Thank you Aside from the blow of loosing someone to a PTSD suicide, it's more a numb feeling... teary eyed at work and trying to keep my head down and appearances up, but it's tough today... My wife says she's ok and that she would never do anything, but she didn't tell me she was seriously battling depression until a few months ago and is now telling me it's passed... I just don't think enough people know what's going on... ya know?
...if you can get away from work a bit early, do it...and spend some time with your wife. That's much more important. She might be secretly keeping things inside...talk to her some more and reassure her.
I'm already here late.... normally would have left over half an hour ago... shutting down now and hitting the road
Steve, there's really nothing that can be said at this time that could erase or even ease the pain that both you & your wife feel at this time. I could only offer my condolences which never seem to be enough. I'll keep you both & your friend & her family in my prayers.
Hammer, 1st I applaud both You and Your Wife....... 2nd You never need to apologize for Your sincere feelings, lil' brother..... I thought I had seen my share of loss, moreso than normal, which has sent me reeling back n forth into depressions, from those losses..... PTSD does't effect only War Vets, it can strike as you see about anyone, who's worlds get turned upside down, and Depression is one serious son of a bitch of a disease, (if ya' wanna' call it that).......... I'll be honest-there's not much more I can say, that could or would help you both. You seem to be right on track with your Warrior Nature, yet that too, I know is hard.....Yours and Your lovely Wife Heather's messages, ring a loud bell in my head, and I too would be lying if I didn't say, all you've posted in this thread, resulted in my own tears for the incredible pains that are our lives, ie for You and Your lovely Wife...My Wife read your post, and she too sobbed........ It's a heavy heavy life and burden at times, amongst good times, they're too often are beyond bad times, for some..... All I can say is: focus on the moment, and reside with a sharp focus to realize each breathe we take is a sacred moment; to squeeze every ounce of joy out of life, tho' life is not only full of joy......that'll be your road in this life...... My middle initial is D. as in David, but when I met my own wife, and we over time decided to get married, I told her, "you've gotta' know if you marry me, your life too will be a lesson in loss, as my middle initial is Death which is always waiting behind my shoulders"......for her it started with losing our neighbor on my LL Team, who was struck by a Car and dragged 100 feet under it, a Honda Civic.......he was a vegetable when He was picked up, and passed unmercifully 8 days latter, never regaining consciousness........(only 1 of over 50+ close friends I've lost)..... Only a couple of things keep me from falling into weekly depressions still to this date..........I learned when my Grandad took his own life: Why take one's life, when all one needs to do, is live on the edge of reality, like Chuck Yeager did when he broke the sound barrier, or every Muroc (EAFB) pilot did in the 50s, when 1.7 Pilots lost their lives weekly....... My saying why take your life, when you can change it, and live on Danger's edge of life, why not skydive into the Yukon (my last jump) or climb Anapurna or Everest, or dive with Great White's, (we've talked alot about these things in the past, or lightly touched on them)........these are the tools to cope with my losses, and sheer reality everyone of us must go, at some point, but that sure doesn't help at all..... After awhile the help people try to give is often not enough, because most people aren't trained in Grief Counseling, yet one need not be a Psycho-therapist to help another who suffers......I firmly believe, if there is a reason I am alive, it has been to help others alleviate their suffering, which in turn is the only way to help alleviate my own, other than daring life with every jump, or fk, every trip down the LA freeways.....life is here one moment, gone the next, and I don't wan't to have any latter reservations, that I may of held back, by reaping the joy out of life; especially with those around us/me, who need it, often like the unseen victims amongst society, who deal with this deep anguish daily......I try to put a smile on every good persons face I come into contact with, and a laugh is even better yet........ But their is nothing here to laugh at, your post and life is serious as a heart attack.......like those who already posted, Hammer........you have a good support group right here..... I wish you and yours the best, and tho' I'm not a Holy Man, (tho' do hold a Bachelor's in Theology/Divinity), we will all pray for you both; back here,.......... live Life as if it were your last day everyday....
My significant other gave me a pretty good education on HG and given that information Hammer I wish all the best for you and yours.
Thanks guys Some of the guys from the supporters group have responded... #1: A very sad day and it also highlights the plight of HG sufferers, there simply isnt enough done to help eithier during or after. I'm sure that many had the same attitude that my wife had that HG was all in the head etc etc. Ive got 2 HG daughters, no plans for anymore due to the affect it had on us and the oldest having to witness it all during the second HG pregnancy. My wife was completely incolsoleable when she read this this morning, it couls so easily be any HG sufferer that it happens to. #2: My wife is one of the admins for the HG warriors. It's been a fucking asshole of a day today. I hate this for all who are affected!! PTSD is correct. The mental scars it continues to lay upon our wife's or SO. RIP Polly..... #3: My wife was close with Polly. This HG brings so much with it. And we're waiting to see if we're pregnant again. And this... Many tears and prayers. It's not ok, But it will be #4: Amen to that Stephen. My wife Gen is 13 months postpartum and suffering from severe PTSD. She is like a completely different person to who I met. Like most people, I thought that HG during the pregnancy was bad and that once little one was born that would be it, but nooooo. Second time round seems to be so much worse. As a family we are working through/coping with PTSD, but it is so hard on everybody, especially the children who can't understand. As a founding Member of the HGWarriors group along with Polly, I am concerned as to how this will affect Gen. I know others are also concerned about how this will affect other HGWarriors so can I ask that we all keep an eye out and if we hear anything then please let each other know. I have taken Gen up to where Polly took her life and she met with Polly's Aunt who has managed to give some answers to questions that some of the HGWarriors had. This seems to have eased some of the guilt and helped a little. Her Aunt is looking after the two daughters and has been for some time. She is looking to adopt them both in due course and loves them very much. Polly was very ill not only with the after effects of HG/PTSD but had other issues aswell. Her Aunt said that the mental health team were excellent and did everything they could to help. Polly's struggle with HG is no more, she was very much an HGWarrior and will always be. RIP Polly. Talking with my wife, she knows #4's wife Gen is taking it extremely hard & blames herself for not doing more...
Guilt is one of the 1st emotions that enter a very complex world of loss, and no one should feel guilty, yet even knowing as much, rarely suffices, for the survivors.........
Hammer. Your wife is your best friend. My wife had severe female problems in year 2000. I felt awkward but my resolve was to stand by and be with her. You needed to find some friends who understand and consul and these guys are all class. I can understand what your experiencing and hope times turn for the better for you and your wife.
0.5-2% of all pregnant women? that's significant, genetic link? hCG beta the culprit? you know hammer a very lose dose hCG receptor antagonist or anti-hCG (beta subunit epitope) antibody would be an interesting approach. Essentially we're ooking at a hyper immuno response. I'm guessing a high number of suffers also did fertility treatments? so that would be the environmental factor as well.
Tom, what was/is the physical condition which you once clarified, which Tex has........the one reason for his diet of no gluten, no sugars, and no fats........? I know this is not the best of posts to ask, yet while were on diseases from hell, can you tell me once again, please.........?
No to the fertility treatments that I'm aware of.... Maybe 5% of the HG warriors either my wife or I interact with were fertility cases. The question, though, is who ethically would experiment on a pregnant woman, let alone one suffering so badly. That isn't a bad idea though...
animal testing first. and as for who would test on pregnant women? oh i've met my fair share of progressives in academia that view pregnancy as a state of parasitic symbiosis. These are the same fuckers that profit off of aborted fetus organs. We live in a world of scumbags. its curious that hCGbeta levels are known to be elevated. Makes me wonder if there are any natural compounds that are partial antagonists of the hCG receptor. Then the treatment could be dietary, especially if the supplement can shown to be GRASS listed. wonder if anyone has ever screened this target?
And considering what was just released regarding Planned Parenthood selling baby parts... good lord... But it isn't just testing on pregnant women... it would be testing on SICK pregnant women...
Wow.......being a new father or mother, just isn't what it used to be, baby parts seriously....??? (I wouldn't doubt it, tho').........not much surprises me these years, less that porker in the Pig Pen, having His Party and Date, with His Swine..........
