I would like to point out that in some of the threads, on this very forum - I can read some of all you'all farts.
I had a miniature Schnauzer, who was a great dog, that if he heard a fart he would turn and sniff his butt.
My little Boston Terrier Simon... I loved him but he was a FARTY lil shit! He was a Velcro dog (always heeling when I walked snuggling when I watched TV or slept). He'd lay right next to you, fart, sniff his own butt, then get up and move away like YOU farted.... I miss my little farter...
Little known fact: If you're seated on the couch and you feel one coming on, lift your legs above your hips and light the fart close to your butt with a match. You'll be in for a great surprise. If you're smoking weed at the time you'll be in for endless laughter.
I have hearing aids. I don't use them all the time and when I don't I often think I'm getting away with a public fart when Ms. Further turns towards me in horror and laugh alerting me to my thunderous butt percussions.
When I was 11 I was at a summer camp in the San Juan Islands. The camp had about 15 horses for the kids to ride which was mostly a wonderful treat. However, one sweet grey older horse named Domino was always the last horse to be chosen by other campers but became my favorite horse to trot around on. Domino had a kind demeanor and a penchant for farting with every single step. I honestly don't know how Domino could have that much rancid air inside him but every single step the horse took included a brief butt rumble. I thought it was hilarious to get on that horse get right in front of some of the camp bullies and then incessantly ask them how it smelled. I got punched a couple times for that because everyone would laugh at those bullies, and I was tiny back them. My memory of those days doesn't include any pain from the punches, just victory for getting those bullies so riled up as the butt of my joke.
