You Do Voodoo

Discussion in 'Portland Trail Blazers' started by e_blazer, Mar 26, 2019.

  1. e_blazer

    e_blazer Rip City Fan

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    Okay, time to take the darkness hanging over the board and turn it into some dark humor. Since the Blazers have suffered injuries to 2 of their top 3 players, if you were a voodoo practitioner, which 2 players on each of the teams contending for the playoffs in the West would you stick your pins into to level the playing field for the Blazers? Actually, I think since Portland is home to Voodoo Donuts, I think making a player donut and taking a bite out of it is preferable to the pincushion doll thing, but whatever works for you.
     
  2. GrandpaBlaze

    GrandpaBlaze Predictions Game Master

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    To approximate the Blazers, I'm leaving who I picture as their top (although debatable in some cases). Granted, I don't follow some of these teams much so my picks may not be the greatest.

    Warriors - Kevin & Klay
    Nuggets - Murray & Harris
    Rockets - Paul & Capela
    Jazz - Gobert & Crowder
    Clippers - Williams & Harrell
    Spurs - Aldridge & Gay
    Thunder - Westbrook & Adams
     
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  3. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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    Time to sage cleanse the Moda center again. Last time I did it, was the season Dame hit the .9 shot.
     
  4. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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    And don't fuck with Voodoo. Trust me. I got fucked over in NOLA doing so.
     
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  5. kjironman1

    kjironman1 Well-Known Member

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    VooDoo makes their donuts too sweet. Yeah i always get an upset stomach after them also.
     
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  6. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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    oh I meant real voodoo dolls. but yeah, most of their shit tastes stale.
     
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  7. Orion Bailey

    Orion Bailey Forum Troll

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    Blue star all the way. Much better coffee too.
     
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  8. crandc

    crandc Well-Known Member

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    Sorry, but Warriors has to be Draymond
     
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  9. julius

    julius I wonder if there's beer on the sun Staff Member Global Moderator

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    do tell
     
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  10. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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    Messing around with a voodoo doll i bought on fat tuesday. Scaring people with it and pretended it could talk and having it host its own reality show, the doll asking girls to show their tits, just being an annoying drunk.

    Got nailed in the head from an flying bottle was bleeding bad (too crowded to be targeted, random bottle). Didn't get knocked over or out, but the EMTs wanted me to go to ER (which i didn't)

    The voodoo doll vanished.
     
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  11. PDXFonz

    PDXFonz I’m listening

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    Yeah so if you could do that before the injury next time, that would be great!
     
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  12. e_blazer

    e_blazer Rip City Fan

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    Sounds more like don’t be an a-hole when playing with voodoo dolls.
     
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  13. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    This totally explains everything....it's like seeing the elprez matrix!
     
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  14. Wizard Mentor

    Wizard Mentor Wizard Mentor

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    Thunder: Westbrook... just stick him twice, like REALLY hard.
    Houston: Too obvious
    LAC: Double sticking Doc Rivers
    GS: Too many to list...
     
  15. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    Still always and forever...Raymond Felton
    voodoo doll.jpg
     
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  16. KingSpeed

    KingSpeed Veteran

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    I put voodoo pins in a stuffed Pelican and left it a graveyard in NO before Game 3 last season. Obviously, it didn't work.
     
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  17. BLAZINGGIANTS

    BLAZINGGIANTS Well-Known Member

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    Okay. Just so we’re clear....

    What do we do the other 364 days that “darkness” hangs over this board?
     
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  18. EL PRESIDENTE

    EL PRESIDENTE Username Retired in Honor of Lanny.

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    How can u not be an asshole on Bourbon street on fat Tuesday? Come on bro
     
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  19. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    if this is an actual riddle my answer would be you would have to be a bar stool...just propping up assholes
     
  20. e_blazer

    e_blazer Rip City Fan

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    I think you'll need to find Mags for help alleviating that darkness.
     
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