Post some funny stories you can recall from the NBA. <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'>For example, this story of the genius Dale Davisavis was fined $100,687.50 (one game's salary) for missing the game against Minnesota this month. Davis' Mercedes truck was buried in snow in his driveway at his home in the West Hills. So he called a friend to give him a ride and carried two suitcases one-quarter of a mile down an icy, snow-filled road to a friend's waiting car. "Then, the car got stuck in the snow," Davis, 34, said. So, they called a tow truck. "Then, the tow truck took forever to come." So Davis missed the team bus. I f you're looking for common ground between Davis and Trail Blazers management, it is this: It snowed this month and Davis missed the bus. The rest is a mess. On and on. Back and forth. Team president Steve Patterson said he offered to send a car to Davis' house. Patterson also said that the team bus even pulled off Interstate 205 and waited for Davis, who never came. "Our travel party has 30 people in it and they were all there, except him," Patterson said. But it's the way he was informed of the fine that, Davis said, really irked him. "They sent me a certified letter." That letter caused Davis to walk out of Friday's practice, which resulted in an additional $5,000 fine from the team, which prompted Saturday's pregame meeting, which resulted in two potential starters standing in the showers in street clothes before a game in which the team played flat.</div>
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'>A convenience store videotape recorded after a March crash involving Eddie Griffin shows the Minnesota Timberwolves forward telling store employees that he was drunk and he didn't want to go to jail.In a statement released Friday, Griffin said he regrets the incident and "would like to apologize to my family, my teammates, and the community for any embarrassment that my actions may have caused."But that's not the worst part...A court document released to the public Friday states that Eddie Griffin was drunk and masturbating when he crashed his luxury SUV into a parked Suburban outside a store in Minneapolis, according to a lawsuit filed Thursday by the man whose Suburban was hit in the crash.WCCO-TV obtained copies of 911 calls and store surveillance video of the incident, along with an accident report the police submitted to the state, reports WCCO-TV's Caroline Lowe.Several of the 911 callers that night said Griffin was drunk. One witness said Griffin told him he was watching pornography in a DVD player mounted on the dashboard of his Cadillac Escalade SUV when he struck a Chevy Suburban parked on University Avenue Southeast.The location where Griffin crashed is located a couple miles from the Target Center where Griffin had played with his team several hours earlier.Abed Hassuneh, who is the brother of the victim, said Griffin told him, "That he was masturbating himself going down that street. That's how the accident happened because he was not paying attention. He's paying attention to that video and all of a sudden he's shoveled somebody's car on the top of the sidewalk."</div> :HAHAHA: :HAHAHA: :HAHAHA:
Thats right up there with this: <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'>Another Trailblazer in trouble with the law - the second in two weeks to have his car towed. Qyntel Woods Cadillac Escalade is hard to miss among the vehicles at a tow yard in north Portland. "It's definitely by far one of the nicest ones we get," said the owner of 21st Century Towing, Clark Tenney. But to police, it's just another vehicle being held as evidence. A Portland police officer had the Blazer's Escalade impounded Sunday evening after he pulled Woods over for failing to signal a left turn. He then discovered Woods was driving with a suspended license and without proof of insurance. "In a case like this, you would wonder why the individual who has probably those resources, has not taken care of the insurance," said Tenney. The same officer pulled Woods over last March for speeding on I-5. At that time he didn't have valid insurance either, and when the officer asked for his drivers license Qyntel gave the officer his player trading card. At that time, Woods was also cited for possessing less than an ounce of marijuana. His latest incident comes less than two weeks after another Trailblazer Rasheed Wallace had his car towed for driving without a license and not having insurance. Tow yard owner and long time Blazers fan Tenney said that it doesn?t make sense. "First thing I think about is the aspects of the money they make," said Tenney. "They make millions and millions of dollars every year and they can't afford what us people have to do every day to survive - insurance, driver's license, and be responsible." New director of player programs, Jerome Kersey, had to stand before the media last week and try to explain why Rasheed Wallace was driving without a license and proof of insurance. On Tuesday he had to stand up for Woods because he had the same problem. After Qyntel Woods was asked about his driving with a suspended license and no proof of insurance Tuesday, he immediately got up and ended the interview. That left Jerome Kersey to speak for him. "I wouldn't have put checking license and insurance on my list," said Kersey. For now Blazers GM John Nash will have to do what most wouldn't think would be necessary, treat men like boys. "What we intend to do during camp is to check everybody's license, insurance and proper credentials," said Nash. Woods was fined $800 for the incident that sent his car to the tow yard. He'll still be required to pay another couple hundred dollars to get his car out of impound.</div>
Its hard to compete with Marvin "Bad News" Barnes. Here is a story about him:<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'>The best News story I know (from either David Halberstam or Frank Powers) involves Barnes sleeping through a team flight. They called him to tell him he was going to miss the flight. "News will catch a later flight," he said. About 5 minutes before tipoff, Barnes shows up. He's dressed in his uniform, and wearing a full-length mink coat. He's also polishing off a Big Mac and fries. "Have no fear... Bad News is here."</div>How about this one:<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'>In 1972, ABA basketball legend Marvin "Bad News" Barnes, refusing to board a flight scheduled to leave Louisville, KY at 8 a.m. and land in St. Louis, MO at 7:59 a.m. was quoted as saying:"I ain't goin' on no time machine."</div>He was referring to flying from one time zone to another so that when he landed it was as if time went backward.Bad News was great but I dont think ANYTHING competes with Gilbert Arenas. When he was a rookie he got the normal rookie treatment. One day they sent him out to get a bunch of powdered donuts. He brushed all the powder off and applied baby powder to them. 3-4 guys starting eating the baby powder donuts then they almost throw up. Arenas could not stop laughing.
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (BALLAHOLLIC @ Jul 7 2006, 12:37 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div><div class='quotemain'>Its hard to compete with Marvin "Bad News" Barnes. Here is a story about him:How about this one:He was referring to flying from one time zone to another so that when he landed it was as if time went backward.Bad News was great but I dont think ANYTHING competes with Gilbert Arenas. When he was a rookie he got the normal rookie treatment. One day they sent him out to get a bunch of powdered donuts. He brushed all the powder off and applied baby powder to them. 3-4 guys starting eating the baby powder donuts then they almost throw up. Arenas could not stop laughing.</div> :HAHAHA: :HAHAHA: Those are good, I hadn't heard the Gilbert one before. That's a good prank.
