For the most part pretty good as i dont have the ex around wreaking havoc on my mental. It does get a little worse if i dont get much sleep from being anxious about something, usually a work trip and just trying to be fully prepared for whatever i need. Which youd think that after as many times as ive done it now that id be fine but still happens. I also have the worst gag reflex in the world, partially because of this i think, so any hint at stomach anxiety or a bad smell of some sort and im pretty much guaranteed to throw up. Dunno if you were having similar issues with your gut, and it definitely took me awhile to figure out that it was anxiety causing it, because i was smoking a ton of dabs/weed at the time (Still smoke ton of weed not so much dabs) my mom thought it was Cannabinoid hyperemesis syndrome, docs thought it coulda been that or an ulcer, did camera check and had nothing, so they gave me heavy antacids thinking thatd help and it kinda did but still would eventually throw up given anxiety. and at the time I had the ex girlfriend constantly threatening to commit suicide and freaking out at the drop of a dime, I found a dog who i couldnt get any shelter to take in without it being a kill shelter so i ended up taking care of her, found out she needed a double hip surgery that cost about 6 grand (which whatever stressed she caused id go through again shes the fucking best... Ex not so much), I was freelancing as a filmer for a skate company only making a grand a month and luckily i had a loft apartment that only cost me 500 a month (fucking insanity to this day to me) and the rest went to food and gas to go skate. I'd make other money doing things for ESPN and other companies but I was usually neting negative and borrowing money from my parents. And then to top it off right after finding Brooklyn the dog, I got robbed at gun point for all my camera gear (bout 6-8 grand worth of equipment), so throw in a little PTSD in there to boot. So to say i was going through it at the time would probably be a slight understatement. So basically every morning id look at each of the problems id be going through, throw up and then not want to eat because i was so hungry and stressed out. So I'd smoke until i could get hungry again or id drink hella smoothies, but still lost a ton of weight to the point where people thought I was going through cancer treatments or some shit. It eventually evened out a bit and it fully helped I had a good support system cus if not i fully could be living on the streets right now, I got let go from the freelance gig and eventually found a full time gig that ive been at more or less ever sense. Ex got into a college far away from Socal, we agreed it was fully not working and broke up when she moved, and I fully removed her from my life for the most part since then. I ended up catching the guys who robbed me via facebook, he got arrested but got off pretty easy since he was a minor when he robbed me, even using a weapon, and he didn't have my camera gear anymore supposedly, so i lost out on that, but hes court ordered to pay me back what the cameras were worth and he gains interest on it i believe, so every once and awhile ill get a random check from the courts from him. Nothing to write home about but not nothin at the same time. My uncle who had just retired as a college teacher loaned me a significant amount of money and I had gotten paid from a bigger job I had just done so I was able to buy a newer camera and replaced the one that got stolen with something better, (but hind sight i shoulda just bought the same setup I had because the new one (Sony FS700 if your familiar...) was hands down a fully different camera setup than i was used to (Glorified HD Dad cam HPX170) and caused issues with my freelance job as they didnt like what i was giving them. But thats a different side story that also caused anxiety). And I was able to find a vet who basically halfed Brooklyns hip surgery bill and I was able to raise enough money through gofundme to pay for most of it and shes been good ever sense which is coming up on 10 years now. I work for a skate company thats super small but our parent company just got bought out by dana white and his investment firm, they might be moving to vegas soon but we might have openings for sales stuff, i know one of our lead sales guys just left/let go because he said he wasnt willing to move (which might be a hang up for you as well but they might be starting off remote for a bit who knows) so if you wanna toss me your resume i can check and see if we have any openings that might work. I also know tons of film guys so if you got a reel of your work if you do camera work or something and I can pass that along too if i think of a good fit.
Also throwing this out there but if you can afford it/have insurance fully recommend finding a therapist you like and feel like you can talk to about anything. It honestly helps a ton, and need to get back to it myself tbh. Even when you feel like you got your shit together past shit comes up all the time through different situations (which is what im dealing with now). I know some people get hung up on telling strangers their interlife workings or whatever, but telling someone a situation that youre dealing with and has no skin in the game either way other than providing an outsiders prospective can really fucking help sometimes. Its all about finding the right one though, which is the most difficult part, because if you feel like you cant bring up something or you guys have polar opposite views IE your hardcore athiest and the therapist is a bible thumper straight out of sunday school, or super right wing vs left wing type shit, it probably wont be as helpful.
Deep breathing exercises have definitely helped me weather those stormy moments. It's like hitting the pause button and reminding your body, ""Hey, we can get through this."" But if you're feeling overwhelmed and traditional techniques aren't working, there's no shame in reaching out for help. Talking to a therapist can be like having a lighthouse in the storm – they can guide you to calmer waters. Besides, there are resources available to help you out, and sometimes a helping hand can make all the difference. In case anyone needs it, here's a helpline for PTSD and panic attacks: https://mentalhealthhotline.org/ptsd-hotline/. Remember, you're not alone in this!
I take some ice cold milk with your cookies….. then we’ll go over and watch my daughter play a little soccer!
I am lactose intolerant. I buy milk only to make yogurt. So you can bring milk or drink my homemade almond milk.
