I heard this joke going on 40 years ago, told by a female DJ on KZEL. It's possibly the only thing I remember from those hazy days. What's the difference between a band of pygmies and a girl's track team? One is a cunning bunch of runts.... (Don't ban me, bro!)
Ring..."Why sure, I'd love to talk about my insurance options and free vacation with you at 6am this morning...thanks for calling! First I'll be needing your full name....email address...home address and ssn #....as soon as I get those written down hang up and I'll call you right back!"
Can a man trust his wife when she says the old washing machine isn't getting the clothes clean and she "needs" that shiny new red one?
The other day my six year old was concentrating really hard on his LEGO project and was getting obnoxiously gassy. I asked him if he needed to use the bathroom and he said “it’s okay dad, I’m a professional at not pooping.”
What if UFOs are piloted by us from the future, coming back to stop us from destroying ourselves, to help us advance, etc. Maybe they look pale and strange due to the effects of time travel.
I actually created the name from two albums. Stampede by the Doobie Brothers and Time Loves a Hero from Little Feat. With these two albums a person can reach nirvana. PS" I have Frank Zappa albums.
Google Photos is a really amazing way to store photos. Unlimited backup, and my photos can sync with the wife's so when she takes the kids out on a trip I can see the photos she takes of them practically in real time.
The french word for ugly is laid. Just for reference, this guy is basically their Elvis Presley. All those struggling American artists hungry for fame, and all they need is some expensive foreign language study courses and an Aquiline nose transplant.
My wife and I just bought our 11-year-old one for Christmas. We had been having him use a "dumb phone", but the phone itself was not reliable, and he was unable to participate in group text conversations between us, him, and his older sister--seems like a minor issue, but somehow in our family, the group text has become a crucial issue. Anyway... We believe very strongly in parental controls on electronic devices, so while he has a smart phone, it is protected by an app called "Mobile Fence". The subscription is like $90/year (IIRC), but to me it's well worth it. App allows me to allow/restrict pretty much anything the phone is able to do.
I already bought the new on for her; I did compromise by finding one with a little scratch for 40% off.
Do the laundry yourself and find out. Question for single guys: when you eat alone in a restaurant (real one, not fast food) are you sometimes/often treated shabbily? Wait while people who arrived after you are served? Hustled out without being asked if you want dessert? This happens to single ladies frequently and I wonder about men?
