Notice Learn To Swim, Learn To Swim, Learn To Swim!!!

Discussion in 'Blazers OT Forum' started by Orion Bailey, Jul 13, 2021.

  1. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    I live in the foothills of the coastal range so if the seas rise I'll be living in a place that resembles Norway but the weather will be like Santa Barbara and I can finally grow avocados!
     
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  2. Chris Craig

    Chris Craig (Blazersland) I'm Your Huckleberry Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    It's not gonna rise that much....you won't be suddenly beach front property....I don't think. That would some bad bad flooding
     
  3. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    There would be rivers everywhere and it would be like Scandinavia if the water rose substantially...good for my fishing and kayaking hobbies...the valley is a flood plain with the largest resevoir in the state and the runoff from two mountain ranges...sort of a soup bowl if that happened...I have two kayaks, snorkeling gear, fins, water wings, I'm a great swimmer....no problems...I'd be like Sean Connery in the Rock
     
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  4. ehizzy3

    ehizzy3 RIP mgb

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    I learned to swim recently (still not confident) and I’ve missed out a lot of fun swimming opportunities because I was scared.

    I was a stubborn little kid. When I was taking swim lessons I had a blast in the kid pool. But when they tried to graduate me to the big pool I wouldn’t move an inch for the whole hour lol
     
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  5. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    True story...bell bottoms were invented for sailors to be used as flotation devices if you were overboard...tie a knot in each leg bell and smack them on the water then lie between the air bags and float....navy bootcamp exercise
     
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  6. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    I hear riverman is praying for some bad bad flooding.
    This is the very definition of Chickenshit. In fact in Webster's dictionary under chickenshit, I saw a picture of your face.
     
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  7. crandc

    crandc Well-Known Member

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    Am I also chicken shit because I can't swim?
     
  8. riverman

    riverman Writing Team

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    If you're ever in deep water just curl up in a fetal position ball and you'll stop sinking and float to the surface...you should learn to float and tread water even if you can't swim...it's just a couple simple things...you can learn holding onto the side of a shallow pool and kicking you legs until you float float without standing...learning to swim is pretty easy...conquering a fear of water is more difficult
     
  9. crandc

    crandc Well-Known Member

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    Not fear of water exactly. I am extremely near sighted. When I was a child, they would take away my glasses and stick me in a pool. I couldn't see instructor, or where I was going, or bottom of pool so would freak.
     
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  10. PDXFonz

    PDXFonz I’m listening

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    Just don’t have Peter Gabriel as your swimming instructor
     
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2021
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  11. donkiez

    donkiez Well-Known Member

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    6 times for me and my very first concert ever at Salem Armory in 93 (or 94?) For $13 a ticket on the undertow tour. Also saw them at the Schnitz concert hall once. After a show at the memorial coliseum with Tricky, I vowed to not waste money on an arena tour with them ever again, the acoustics are so disappointing for their layered music. I've also seen APC 4 times.
     
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  12. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    Your picture is not in Webster's so I'll have to assume that you qualify as one of Sly's elite guard based on your bravery. Just don't let the fight take you anywhere near water.
     
  13. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    They have goggles with built in corrective lenses base on the goggle owner's vision. No, I'm not kidding. At least they used to make such goggles and they make sense so I see no reason why they would discontinue them.
    My short coming was two fold:
    1. I needed nose plugs until I was about 13;
    2. I was abnormally small and the big kids and older ones use to love to invite me to swim with them so they could push my little head under water. I would go into absolute panic mode. But then I developed this fantastic ability to swim under water and when coupled with my tiny size when the bigger kids would try to half drown me I could swim underwater in places they feared to go such as between timbers supporting docks. Once I developed that ability I never again gave them a chance to drown me. When I graduated from high school I finally went through my growth spurt and that coupled with working summers with my father meant I could finally beat any of them at arm wrestling. Hence, my currently massive brain and biceps. Seriously, when I was 53 I could leg press 560 lbs. Confession - When in the locker room all alone and after my shower I would stand in front of the mirror, naked, and flex and impress myself. The most impressive? Your Jewish so you know what this means, I was really impressed with my massive schlong.
     
  14. HailBlazers

    HailBlazers RipCity

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  15. UncleCliffy'sDaddy

    UncleCliffy'sDaddy We're all Bozos on this bus.

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    An absolutely true story (it’s even mentioned in the Wikipedia page on the USS Blue Ridge)………..we were on a big exercise, invading the island of Mindoro in the Philippines. On our way there from Subic Bay, an ensign (that came on board the same day as me) fell overboard in the middle of the night (long story). Nobody saw or heard him and we didn’t know he was missing till late morning (it was a Friday). So the whole flotilla turned around and went looking for him to no avail. We were all bummed (he was a unicorn….a popular officer) but we finally wrote him off and went back on our way to “liberate” the Mindorans. On Monday we were notified by the chain of command that Ensign Long had been picked up by the Russian trawler that was always tailing/monitoring our activities (we were a designated flag ship). When he had fallen over the side (and avoided being sucked under by the screws), Mr. Long yanked off his khakis, knotted them at the cuffs and stayed afloat for 14-15 hours on his improvised water wings! The Russians hauled him aboard, confined him (while treating him well) and notified their chain of command starting in Vladivostok and working it’s way west around the world till it got back to us. Another long story short……we steamed out to retrieve him in exchange for tubs of ice cream and cartons of cigarettes. Mr. Long was a very lucky mofo…….and is why I always have a strong urge to take a pair of pants with me when I go swimming……..
     
  16. tlongII

    tlongII Legendary Poster

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    Shit. I thought I invented bell-bottoms?!
     
  17. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    I learned this at the YMCA when I was 12.
     
  18. GriLtCheeZ

    GriLtCheeZ "Well, I'm not lookin' for trouble."

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    Yer up shit creek without a dog paddle.
     
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  19. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    Aha, the coke bottle glasses syndrome.
     
  20. Lanny

    Lanny Original Season Ticket Holder "Mr. Big Shot"

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    I've been up there. Trust me, there's nothing to see and it's hell getting back.
     
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