The official Jusuf Nurkic facts thread

Discussion in 'Portland Trail Blazers' started by Mediocre Man, Mar 29, 2017.

  1. stampedehero

    stampedehero Make Your Day, a Doobies Day Staff Member Moderator

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    Apparently, Bosnian cops know where illicit behavior occurs.
     
  2. stampedehero

    stampedehero Make Your Day, a Doobies Day Staff Member Moderator

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    Bodyman has a man crush on Nurk.
     
  3. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    [​IMG]

    He's gotta wait his turn....
     
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  4. Minstrel

    Minstrel Top Of The Pops Global Moderator

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    When Nurkic orders food in a restaurant, the waiter says, "Yes, sir"...and brings it to him.
     
  5. andalusian

    andalusian Season - Restarted

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    Bosnia is the pet name of Nurkicstan
     
  6. SIeepwalker

    SIeepwalker The lone sane poster

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    Honestly all the things you all say about Nurkic in this thread are dumb as fuck. He's just not that great. You know what, if he was all that, he would appear in my house and smash my head into the keybisjfgpsogsfjs jsl;gq!sglskhrqlùkg
     
  7. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    Read the whole thread: :D

     
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  8. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    On the morning of August 21st 2017, Jusuf Nurkic decided to fly his wingsuit across the US. It took approx 1 hour and 33 minutes. Millions gathered to watch.
     
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  9. e_blazer

    e_blazer Rip City Fan

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    That's an inventive interpretation, but I believe the truth is much simpler: Nurk was down at Lincoln City and, when he awoke this morning he stretched in the sunlight, thereby casting a shadow across the continent.

    Edit: Well damn! There's that whole sun rising in the east thingie that I seem to have overlooked here.

    Edit No. 2: Now that I think about it more, I think it's totally within the Nurk's powers to pick up the planet and shift it on its axis so that the morning sun from Lincoln City would cast his shadow across the continent west to east.
     
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2017
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  10. PtldPlatypus

    PtldPlatypus Let's go Baby Blazers! Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    I made eclipse viewing glasses out of two Jusuf Nurkic basketball cards, and not only could I stare straight at the sun for the entire eclipse, but I now have 20/10 vision and may also be able to see into the future, which incidentally looks a lot like Jusuf Nurkic.
     
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  11. Orion Bailey

    Orion Bailey Forum Troll

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    Ive been typing in this post for a while now about this funny as hell anti Nurk joke, but all that shows up on my screen is...

    Jusuf Nurkic


    SEEEE????
    That was a 4 line joke I just typed!
     
  12. Orion Bailey

    Orion Bailey Forum Troll

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    When Nurk was young and first saw the... "Break me off a piece of that Klondike Bar" commercial, He asked his dad for a trip to the Yukon.....
    Now we have iceburgs breaking off from the mainland and people are blaming it on global warming.. HA!
     
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  13. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    You're forgetting the part about him skydiving without a parachute to cause it. Jesus... People need ALL the info.... :dry:
     
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  14. theprunetang

    theprunetang Shaedon "Deadly Nightshade" Sharpe is HIM

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    He's forgetting that the commercial he was referencing was for Kit Kat bars, not Klondike.
     
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  15. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    HAHAHAHAHA!!! HOLY SHIT!!! I completely forgot... :biglaugh:
     
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  16. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    Klondike is:

    "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?".
     
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  17. theprunetang

    theprunetang Shaedon "Deadly Nightshade" Sharpe is HIM

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    "Break me off a piece of that bud he smokes".
     
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  18. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    FTFY. Remember what thread you're in. ;)
     
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  19. PtldPlatypus

    PtldPlatypus Let's go Baby Blazers! Staff Member Global Moderator Moderator

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    [​IMG]

    Nobody smokes Jusuf Nurkic.
     
  20. dviss1

    dviss1 Emcee Referee

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    [​IMG]
     
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