OT Mandatory Chinese Anal Swabs

[EL PRESIDENTE]

Usually you have to pay extra for that.

 

[e_blazer]

Well, I guess they had to find something to do with all of the chopsticks that aren't being used because of the drop in tourism.

 

[riverman]

I use stainless steel chopsticks.....and they will never get within striking distance of my anus......aikido lessons are going to pay off damnit!

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

I use stainless steel chopsticks.....and they will never get within striking distance of my anus......aikido lessons are going to pay off damnit!

What they don't know is that you have vibrating chopsticks.

 

[BLAZINGGIANTS]

Japan to China: stop anal swabbing our citizens traveling to your country.

 

[BLAZINGGIANTS]

Yeah, you drug smugglers might be having a problem with this.

I don’t smuggle.

 

[BLAZINGGIANTS]

Alright, those that do it for you then, Mr. Big Shot.

Well, that’s not my problem!

(Not my butt, not my problem!)

 

[riverman]

What they don't know is that you have vibrating chopsticks.

rice needs to be tenderized!

 

[barfo]

I use stainless steel chopsticks.....and they will never get within striking distance of my anus......

If your chopsticks were to end up in your ass, you would definitely be doing it wrong.

barfo

 

[riverman]

If your chopsticks were to end up in your ass, you would definitely be doing it wrong.

barfo

if that happens I've failed my Aikido practice and will buy a machine gun for personal protection!

 

[BLAZINGGIANTS]

If your chopsticks were to end up in your ass, you would definitely be doing it wrong.

barfo

whole new meaning of “chop salad”.

 

[Lanny]

I use stainless steel chopsticks.....and they will never get within striking distance of my anus......aikido lessons are going to pay off damnit!

I prefer wooden ones because they grip better.

 

[Lanny]

I don’t smuggle.

I lie about that, too.

 

[riverman]

I prefer wooden ones because they grip better.

The true test is to eat peanuts with the plastic ones the Cantonese like to use.....that takes some skill

 

[e_blazer]

I prefer wooden ones because they grip better.

I prefer the ones made out of metal that have like four or five pointy tines that you can jab into your food to pick it up.

 

[riverman]

I prefer the ones made out of metal that have like four or five pointy tines that you can jab into your food to pick it up.

Ah....the infamous Chinese pitchfork and shovel toolbox!

 

[trailblazer18]

This thread is definitely worse than the Dr. Suess book.

And what's so wrong with an anal swab? Isn't that how you guys take your temperature?

 

[riverman]

This thread is definitely worse than the Dr. Suess book.

And what's so wrong with an anal swab? Isn't that how you guys take your temperature?

When I lived in Taipei during the SARS epidemic everyone had temps taken by the ear.....we take ours now here using just the forehead....you don't need an anal swab to get that reading

 

[trailblazer18]

When I lived in Taipei during the SARS epidemic everyone had temps taken by the ear.....we take ours now here using just the forehead....you don't need an anal swab to get that reading

Yeah, when I was in and out of China during H1N1 it was just the forehead gun to take temperature.

 

[EL PRESIDENTE]

This thread is definitely worse than the Dr. Suess book.

And what's so wrong with an anal swab? Isn't that how you guys take your temperature?

Only if you buy me dinner first.

 

[riverman]

Only if you buy me dinner first.

One used swab appetizer coming up!

 

[SlyPokerDog]

Testing sewage treatment plants has been an effective way of tracing covid in communities. Makes sense that what we put in sewage treatment plants would be an effective way of detecting covid.

My only question is how much do you tip the person giving the test?

 

[riverman]

Testing sewage treatment plants has been an effective way of tracing covid in communities. Makes sense that what we put in sewage treatment plants would be an effective way of detecting covid.

My only question is how much do you tip the person giving the test?

Most swabs already have two tips

 

[BLAZINGGIANTS]

Testing sewage treatment plants has been an effective way of tracing covid in communities. Makes sense that what we put in sewage treatment plants would be an effective way of detecting covid.

My only question is how much do you tip the person giving the test?

UCD is missing out. He retired too early.

 

[BLAZINGGIANTS]

I lie about that, too.

Lie about what?

(And why are you awake at 4am posting on S2? Are you just rising for the day? Or are you still awake?)

 

[UncleCliffy'sDaddy]

UCD is missing out. He retired too early.

Kind of old news. Wastewater treatment plants and their receiving streams have been tested for a plethora of constituents over the years. Covid is simply the latest. Originally they started doing testing to try and determine the drug use levels in the municipalities tested. Imagine our surprise 20 or so years ago when they found that Salem’s meth usage was off the charts......we were shocked. SHOCKED I tell you (but it did lead to a successful local anti meth crusade)........anyway, not sure exactly what they plan to do with the Covid data, but it’s an interesting scientific wrinkle......and as far as tips go, work at a treatment plant long enough and all manner of “tips” float in. One day long ago, after a string of bank robberies in Salem, an unknown amount of Benjamins (with a few Grants thrown in) decided to make an appearance. By the end of the day I was $950 ahead. The next day was the best Costco run EVER.......

 

[SlyPokerDog]

Lie about what?

(And why are you awake at 4am posting on S2? Are you just rising for the day? Or are you still awake?)

Lanny gets up early for dialysis.

 

[BlazerWookee]

Sigh... unzips

 

[riverman]

Sigh... unzips

Doc...the first volunteer is here!

 

[Hoopguru]

I read where you put a certain food coloring in the T Bowl and once it used and it turns yellow, better call the doc.